Liar, Liar! Pants On Fire!
Today, you'll learn about 2 yellow-flag indications the person on the other end of your online chat is possibly a troll (married, partnered or undesirable)...
1. Statute Of Contact Limitations
Beware, beware of anyone putting conditions on when and where you can contact them.
For example - "Sorry, but I don't have a land-line, only a cell-phone."
Or "Don't call me on weekends or after 8:30pm"
Or "Always let me know by email first that you are going to phone me."
Or "Never leave a message on my answering machine."
You need to ask yourself:
"Who has a cell phone but no land-line?"
"What makes a person unavailable to speak on the phone on weekends and evenings?"
"Why would someone require forewarning before being contacted by phone?"
"What's the problem with leaving messages on the answering machine of someone you're dating online?"
Suspicious wouldn't you agree?
In the real-world some excuses may be plausible but unfortunately lying is much more prevelent online, so you must be more skeptical in your judgment of what you read from other people.
The exception where the above may be acceptable is if the dater is still in a dead relationship that hasn't officially ended because of ownership of joint assets or even marriage.
Personally, even in these cases I would still steer clear. Sometimes relationships can take a long time to end and then you may just be catching them on the rebound with a whole lot of emotional baggage to boot, anyway.
If any of these contact limitations are imposed on you I suggest you try the following:
- confront them about it, be gentle but persistent. If they consistently say they can't tell you why or won't revoke the contact limitations then I would say "Bye, bye."
- call them when they aren't expecting it. Who answered, are they angry, are they whispering, are they being secretive, whose voice was it on the answering machine?
- try to find their number in a phone book.
- ask some of the other people you have chatted with at your dating site if they know anything. Keep it polite and 'oh, by the way' so the message doesn't get back you have been checking up on their facts.
2. No Sepia-Toned Photos Please
The biggest reason for telling lies in online dating is, easily, to deceive someone about your physical appearance.
Its common for people to use old photos from a more atractive time in their life.
Old photos are pretty easy to spot. Look for:
- color and image qualities of the photo,
- hair styles,
- facial hair styles,
- clothing styles,
- background images like old advertising or logos
- apparent age in photo compared to written age in profile.
Of course if there is no photo you can't tell. I would say never bother contacting anyone who doesn't have a photo.
Surveys have shown that 80% of people agree with me.
And, unless the dater has only been online dating for a week or so, don't tolerate any excuses like:
- no camera,
- no scanner,
- haven't got around to it yet.
Please! If this person is serious about finding a relationship, they can easily get off their pants and spend 10 bucks on getting a photo scanned or having one taken.
I could go on but once again we've run out of room. In the next article in this series you will learn about what I call the 'Perpetually Unavailable Syndrome' and what to do when it occurs.
Your Truly,
Adam Coole
http://www.gayandlesbianonlinedatingsecrets.com/gay-
lesbian-articles/gay-dating-coursearti
cle3.htm
To read the rest of this exciting series visit Gay and Lesbian Online Dating SECRETSTM and subscribe now.
"How to easily find your Perfect-Partner online."
Direct Answers - Column for the week of June 14,... Read More
While doing my search for this idea, I came across... Read More
Most think that relationships exist to make them happy. When... Read More
BackgroundSeduction is a subtle tool used with the ultimate goal... Read More
is the most important question you'll ever ask yourself. Let's... Read More
I find this dilemma rather common for younger couples, probably... Read More
There are approximately 2 million men in the prison system... Read More
Have you been blindsided by an unhappy spouse who suddenly... Read More
But the cold truth is that most people have never... Read More
Why is it that even though I am not positive... Read More
What is Hoodie-Hoo Day and what does it have to... Read More
I'm always dumbfounded when someone walks up to me and... Read More
Who Is Some Who Loves You?1. Someone who sees the... Read More
What is Chemical Romance? It's a scientific approach to seduction... Read More
My Dear Lover,Soon or later, you and your beloved will... Read More
Subtitle ? A Troll? What the **** is that and... Read More
A strong, healthy relationship is one in which the partners... Read More
The other day, I was home with my sweet love... Read More
How To "Slay The Dragon" In Your Life In Five... Read More
Women are simply wonderful don't you think? This question is... Read More
Many relationship problems often begin with poor communication. Many couples... Read More
Prince Charles and Camilla Parker Bowles have loved each other... Read More
Do you remember when, as a small child at a... Read More
"Kiss: a secret told to the mouth instead of to... Read More
Is your man the cheating type? Here are some clues... Read More
Have you ever been at a loss to think of... Read More
Everything was great.We had been dating for 6 months. We... Read More
There are no better rings to seal your engagement than... Read More
In the real world, can there be romance without finance?... Read More
Ultimately, you want a partner you can be your true... Read More
Does your dating relationship have good communication? Communication during dating... Read More
Are You A 'Hopium Addict?'If the question alone was enough... Read More
This is a question that comes up a lot. It's... Read More
Gentlemen, if you really want to seduce a woman the... Read More
It's been a few months since the riveting headlines: The... Read More
There comes a point in every relationship when the person... Read More
She stares at me and then closes her eyes. A... Read More
When you were little, you looked up to your parents.... Read More
Picture, if you will, the following scene:A man and woman,... Read More
"Know Thyself" PlatoIsn't it curious how just about everything in... Read More
We all have behaviors, tendencies, patterns, and the keen ability... Read More
Although conflict in marriage is inevitable, fighting is optional.The secret... Read More
Humor has long been considered one of the most effective... Read More
"They may forget what you said, but they will never... Read More
How does one talk his/her spouse into living the Swinging... Read More
Sometimes the people who are the closest to us, our... Read More
Direct Answers - Column for the week of June 14,... Read More
How do you show someone you love them? Do you... Read More
How often do we complain that our man isn't romantic... Read More
What is Chemical Romance? It's a scientific approach to seduction... Read More
Q. It's been over a year since the guy I... Read More
I'm always dumbfounded when someone walks up to me and... Read More
I believe that we have all heard of the standard... Read More
1. Sticks and stones won't break my bones" ? and... Read More
Dear Lucia,I know I made a stupid mistake but what... Read More
Sometimes it takes a girlfriend in order to have a... Read More
Love is exciting, and when a relationship is new, almost... Read More
Dr. Nancy Kalish, a psychology professor at California State University,... Read More
The dictionary defines infidelity as "unfaithfulness to a sexual partner".... Read More
Many people, maybe even you, think there is only one... Read More
Fight or flight - our automatic response to danger. When... Read More
Question: What % of your bad moods at work are... Read More
"The truth that makes men free is for the most... Read More
There are some men who will never understand the importance... Read More
In relationship we all make mistakes and sometimes we are... Read More
Matters of the heart are a true mystery to all... Read More
Relationship |