Are Men and Women Really from Different Planets?

Are men really from Mars, and women from Venus?'what women want,' is still left unanswered to men. Even when we reflect upon the 2000 film, What Women Want - lead character, Nick Marshall (played by Mel Gibson) seems to have all the answers. But does he really?

Is it an inevitable fact that men and women are predestined not to clearly understand one another?

I vividly recall a playtime conversation between my son and daughter when they were just preschoolers. In amusement, I watched as my son took his metal matchbox cars and drove them all over his roadmap carpet. 'Vroom...vroom...' he mumbled. And there beside him, sat my three-year old daughter, tightly clasping her little fingers around her own two cars. Adamantly, she waved them in front of her older brother's face and attempted to make her cars have 'dialogue' with his cars. After a few moments of no response, (other than 'vroom, vroom'), my daughter quickly became frustrated.

She folded her arms and marched over to me, "...Mom, Ryan isn't playing right," she said matter-of-factly.

Initially, I wanted to chuckle but I knew she was quite serious. I asked her, "...what do you mean - he is not playing right?"

She blew out a huff and responded, "...I want his cars to talk to my cars and all he does is crash his cars into mine!"

Peering over her head, I saw that my son was unnerved and oblivious to his sister's obvious irritation. While she stood there with absolute disgust, he continued playing with his metal vehicles.

It was at that point that I let out a little giggle, and I gave her a simple answer, "...sweetie, boys like to play and girls like to talk."

It may not have been the answer she was seeking, but this tiny event has shed some light to a wide-spectrum issue in two, very different sexes. Throughout life, I have personally learned that men are action-oriented, whereas women are interaction-oriented. And from personal experience, I have seen that many of these attributes are innate traits stemming back to prehistoric times where males were considered hunter/gatherers and females, considered nurturers.

While human evolution has dramatically evolved with modern technology; longer, healthier life spans and overall improved communication skills - it seems that men and women still do not speak the same language.

Inherently, men use interactions to fulfill essential purposes: entertainment, information communication, task completion, and other related needs. Women on the other hand, prefer to interact to deepen levels of relationships - to better understand their counterpart, or to bring about resolution through interaction. In other words, when men and women communicate, we hear the same dialogue, but we perceive and practice verbal communications very differently.

As with the case of my own two children, my son was absolutely clueless to my daughter's aggravation because he was preoccupied with his own actions. My daughter, however, was intent on interacting with him, and could not understand why he was ignoring her.

This incident clearly demonstrates the concise perceptual differences between males and females. I have heard women tell me, `...he doesn't understand me,' or `...he's not listening to me...' And men, will rebuke, `...I don't know what you're talking about.' It's not that men don't listen to women - it's the fact that they are not hearing precisely what is being said; or perhaps they do not adequately comprehend the meaning behind the words.

Additionally, because women are very interactive creatures, conversation may be invoked while men are actively engaged in a specific event, work or other project. When men are actively doing something, they are often so concentrated with their project that they simply do not hear a word. Women, however, may falsely perceive this inaction as disregarded communication. And then it's back to square one - `...why is he ignoring me?"

To find resolve in relationships, both men and women have to realize that while we all must communicate for progressive action, it is also essential to understand that women and men clearly think in different terms at different times. Before we jump the gun, and imagine the worst of our human counterparts, we must think about what was said, and in what manner it was said as well. Tone of voice plays a vital role in determining our various forms of communication and interaction with one another. If we do not practice, or we are not perceptive to tone of dialogue, as well as the words themselves, then it will obviously be mistaken for a complete different communication altogether. In addition, when individuals do not automatically respond or don't hear others, it does not necessarily mean that the individual is being disrespectful or rejecting.

Because we are only all too human, we have to accept that people make verbal and non-verbal mistakes that may or may not create tension in a relationship. If we begin to understand this is part of human nature, realize that we speak in different context, and comprehend that silence is not always a form of rejection, maybe then, both men and women will be able to reach each other on a positive level of interaction.

© 4/2005 Are Men and Women Really from Different Planets?
By C. Bailey-Lloyd
Aka. LadyCamelot in conjunction with Holistic Junction

C. Bailey-Lloyd
aka. LadyCamelot
Public Relations' Director & Staff Writer for Holistic Junction - Your Source for information on Massage Therapy Schools, Holistic Practitioners, Alternative Health, Insightful literature and more!

---

Spice Up Your Relationship Tonight

Every relationship needs relief from the same old bedroom routine... Read More

Setting Up Boundaries in Relationships

Setting up personal boundaries is important in all types of... Read More

When Someone You Love is Moving

Your best friend moves a thousand miles, your aunt retires... Read More

The Informal Normal In a Black-Tie-Affair World

Have you noticed the trend?You ever notice how on programs... Read More

Why Doesnt She Leave Him?

It's very easy to look, from the outside, at another... Read More

The 4 Deadly Mistakes of Wife Seduction

When a guy gets turned down over and over again... Read More

Relationship Advice: 6 Secrets for Great Relationships

The Law of ContentYou can get into trouble in a... Read More

Add Trust To Your Relationship

Trust is something that is important to every single relationship... Read More

Your Relationships Begin With You

As a single male in my mid-twenties, I find myself... Read More

Great Relationship Advice: The Ability to Create a Vision for Your Relationship

Many of us stumble into marriage and then continue to... Read More

The Ancient Wisdom of Matchmaking & Loving Y.O.U.

"Know Thyself" PlatoIsn't it curious how just about everything in... Read More

Gag Gifts

Gag gifts can be very funny. They can also cause... Read More

Is Your Relationship Worth Fighting For

Sometimes when a relationship has gone sour, our efforts are... Read More

How to Handle Problem People: Life Lessons from a Balky Bovine

Do you have people in your life that p? (make... Read More

Will They or Will They Not Cheat?

Have you ever told your partner or spouse how you... Read More

Thick Slice, Or Thin?

Malcolm Gladwell's book "Blink" is a fascinating read. The subtitle... Read More

9 Myths About Being Single

More than 48% of US households are headed by unmarried... Read More

Are the Neighbors Next Door Secretly Swinging?

The swinging lifestyle does not discriminate against race, body type,... Read More

10 Reasons Why Married Couples Grow Apart (Part II)

This is a continuation of part one of this article... Read More

Gay and Lesbian Relationships

America has a reluctance to accept relationships between people of... Read More

Why Do Men and Women Misunderstand Each Other So Much

Joke from a Woman to another Woman "Some husbands are... Read More

Lab Created Diamonds Are Now Exceedingly Good

When we think of precious gems, we usually spare little... Read More

Quick Tips for Writing Love Letters

* Be in a good mood when writing a love... Read More

Feel Like a (Romantic) Kid Again

If the start of the school year makes you a... Read More

Communication Is The Key To A Lasting Relationship

"If you are trying to find ways to lead a... Read More

The Three Levels of Soul Mates

From my own personal experience of being involved in certain... Read More

Reading Body Language in Depth

Body Language can tell you a lot about what is... Read More

Real Friends

About a year ago, I was talking to a friend... Read More

Relationship Advice: How to Ignore Your Spouse or Partner

Marriage can be one of the quickest and most effective... Read More

Should I Leave This Relationship?

How do you know when it's time to say goodbye... Read More

Your Beloved Soldier Is Coming Home ? Now What?

Your Beloved Soldier Is Coming Home ? Now What?Laura anxiously... Read More

Being A Friend Through A Divorce

We used to joke amongst the couples we are close... Read More

ARC of Understanding

In relationship we all make mistakes and sometimes we are... Read More