Rescue and Rebuild Your Relationship: 7 Tips to Make it Work

Create Time To Share And Time On Your Own.

Establish time to spend together and time for yourself. Although you need the time together to nurture your relationship, it is important to have a good balance. You are not the Mini-Me of each other. You each have your own values, interests and needs. Make sure your couple time is about quality, not quantity. Set up boundaries so the family and friends know that this is your sacred time. Now, it's time to shift focus on you. Having shared perspectives and similar interests does not mean that you have to participate in all activities together. Creating personal time for yourself is important for your personal growth. However, don't use personal space as an excuse to not make time for each other. It is imperative that you articulate to each other the need for this time, so that no one feels neglected.

Be Patient with Each Other.

No one is perfect. It is important that you accept and love each other, quirks and all. Your relationship is a shared territory. It requires love, work and patience There is a learning curve in relationships and for some the learning never stop. There is a difference in how the two of you relate, interact and live. You come to realize each others' strengths and weaknesses. View each other's abilities and personality as a gift. Be more flexible in your viewpoints. Work on win/win methods, so that no one has to lose. It's more important to understand and value each other's viewpoint, rather than trying to agree or disagree with it.

Respect Each Other

Respect each other's values. Respect each other's time. Respect each other's space. Respect each other's privacy. Respect each other's weaknesses. Respect each other's point of view. Respect each other's faith. Respect each other's friends and family. Respect each other's job or career. Respect each other's culture. Respect each other's sense of humor. Respect each other's character. Respect each other's choices. Respect each other's belongings. Respect each other through love.

Highlight What's Right

Highlighting what's right builds up, rather than tears down. Constant criticism diminishes self-esteem. This is why verbal and emotional abuse can be so damaging. No one wants to start or end their day with a laundry list of complaints. Take time to appreciate what's going right in the relationship. Make it a habit of complimenting each other on something besides physical appearance. Build up each other's confidence .Point out noteworthy or small tokens of appreciation. Take the time to show gratitude. When people feel good, they want to share that feeling with others.

Listen

If we spoke less and listened more, it would eliminate many of our communication problems. However, humans are conditioned to listen with the intent to respond. When was the last time you listened attentively to your significant other? Do you listen and then try to solve a problem? Do you listen and then offer advice? Do you listen and then criticize or belittle? Do you listen and then self-reference? When you listen, it builds trust. Your significant other feels understood and will share more with you over time. The next time you see your significant other in a contemplative state, tell them you're available to listen. .

Let Go Of Emotional Baggage

It's time to unpack your emotional baggage. You can not undo the past. Bringing past pain into a present relationship is like mixing dirty clothes with laundered clothes. The old emotions need to be resolved before you can be yourself in your current relationship. Emotional baggage contributes to insecurities, poor judgment, cynicism and indecisiveness. Trying to protect your feelings will hinder your freedom and growth. Think about why you continue to allow yourself to suffer with this pain? Is there someone you need to forgive? Are you carrying around resentment and guilt? Talk about the situation with your significant other, so they can have a better understanding of what you are going through. If the pain is too unbearable, seek professional help together or alone.

Marie Magdala Roker is a Personal Development Coach an Author of Successful Thinking for a Successful Life: How to Banish the Unhealthy Thoughts and Habits That Limit Your Success. Her Successful Thinking? program is an affordable coaching resource that offers support and encouragement when there are roadblocks to success. You can find out more about the program at http://www.thinkandbesuccessful.com or sign up for her free Be Inspired newsletter at http://www.smartbeecoaching.com

---

Relationship Advice: 2 Beliefs for a Successful Relationship

Mark Twain once saidGod's great cosmic joke on the human... Read More

Make Time for Your Relationship

"We don't have to wait till Valentine's Day to think... Read More

Flirting For A Long-Term Relationship

Have you ever wondered why we flirt? I mean, we've... Read More

How to Survive an Affair - Take Care!

Surviving an affair can be a very traumatic experience. Partners... Read More

How to Find Out If Your Wife or Girlfriend Is Cheating On You

What drives a woman to cheat may look a lot... Read More

Relationship Advice: Who Are You and What Have You Done with My Spouse?

"When we marry, we don't marry one person, we marry... Read More

Setting Up Boundaries in Relationships

Setting up personal boundaries is important in all types of... Read More

Lovers Quarrel

One minute you seem like lovesick turtledoves teasing, laughing and... Read More

Are Women From Utopia And Men From Wal-Mart?

It is surprising how many writers, psychologists, or scientists have... Read More

7 Power Skills that Build Strong Relationships

A strong, healthy relationship is one in which the partners... Read More

Great Relationship Advice: Dont Be a Darren Stevens

Q: I can't believe I'm asking this question, because I... Read More

Affairs: Advice for the One Who Strayed

To the spouse who had the affair, it's time for... Read More

Is This The One?

Isn't that the million dollar question? How can I tell... Read More

The Sting

Direct Answers - Column for the week of June 28,... Read More

Relationships that Work: How to Get Along with People Who Drive You Crazy

Question: What % of your bad moods at work are... Read More

Are You Living An Illusion Romance Like Lisa Snowdon and George Clooney?

My Dear Lover,Today I am sad, I don't have good... Read More

Daisies A Story About Life

"I love daisies too," she told him several nights after... Read More

The Economics of True Love

In the real world, can there be romance without finance?... Read More

He?s So Loving (But He Has These Black Moods)

It's strange how often abused women tell you how loving... Read More

What is a Red Flag

The focus of many of the last few articles has... Read More

How To Open Up While Staying Safe

When you've had your heart broken in a relationship, it... Read More

A Kiss is Never Just a Kiss!

"Kiss: a secret told to the mouth instead of to... Read More

The Three Levels of Soul Mates

From my own personal experience of being involved in certain... Read More

Lingerie Buying Advice For Guys

Buying lingerie for your lover can be one of the... Read More

Relationship Advice: Warning Signs of an Emotional Affair

"But we're just friends" are four of the most dangerous... Read More

How to Use Humor to Improve Your Relationships

Humor has long been considered one of the most effective... Read More

Are You Relationship Ready?

So, you want to fall in love? You are certainly... Read More

Are Men and Women Really from Different Planets?

Are men really from Mars, and women from Venus?'what women... Read More

True Love - Part 2

Okay, so why would one person feel strongly about the... Read More

Interview with Tigress Luv: How To Get Over A Breakup

Recently I had the opportunity to interview my personal favorite... Read More

Self Truth and Your Relationships

Questions and AnswersHow can I learn how to be true... Read More

Do You Enable?

We all have behaviors, tendencies, patterns, and the keen ability... Read More

Engaged, In Love, and In Limbo

Well, here I am very much in love and starting... Read More