At age seven months in the womb, humans begin language coordination in response to what they hear through the mother's belly wall. Some 52 muscles learn to respond to the various phonemes (a basic language sound like 'b' in boy and 'm' in man) of the language surrounding that belly. There are also studies showing that the emotional state of the parent imprints as do things like music and other environmental conditions. Nutrition, drug use and pollution spill right through directly to the fetus via the placenta and umbilical cord. Parenting begins way before the bassinet.
At eighteen months, the child has a brain 1/3 the size of an adult but the same number of neural connections. These connections are called synapses and relay information ? outgoing from the nerve cell through axons, ingoing by way of dendrites. It is the number of connections of nerve cells that relates to intelligence, not the number of neurons.
As the brain grows, by age 6 we have about five times the neural connections we do as adults. These trillions upon trillions of connections are there waiting to be imprinted by the environment, parents and society. This is probably the reason, some 2000 years ago, the church started the sacraments at ages 6 or 7. (It is remarkable how so many 'new' scientific discoveries were anticipated by the intuitive traditions of, what we believe to be, unsophisticated minds of the past.) Beginning at about age 12, the fatty myelin sheath covering connecting neuronal tendrils not used, are literally dissolved, absorbed into the cerebrospinal fluid. Thus 80% of the neural brain mass present at age 6 is gone by age 14 as a result of disuse. Further belittling is the fact that of the remaining 20% of the brain, we only use 5%. That means, of our full potential, we only use about 1%! (For evolutionary materialists out there, please explain to me how something as complex as a brain ? infinitely more complex than anything humans have ever invented ? developed so that 80% of it could dissolve and 95% of what remains go unused.)
This 'devolution' of the brain applies to the neocortex, that big part of the brain with all the folds and grooves that humans are so proud of because that's where all our smarts (are supposed to) come from. The more 'primitive' parts of the brain, the 'reptilian' brainstem and limbic systems responsible for stimulus-response sorts of actions and emotion-cognition, remain intact and do not experience this loss. In other words, our ability for 'fight-flight' (running from predators), self-awareness (me, I, look at me), sex (fun stuff and children hatching), eating (wouldn't want to miss that) and road rage (essential in modern living) are never at risk, just our ability to be intelligent about all that base reptilian stuff is.
Nothing new here, right? Is it not clear which parts of the human brain are in full function today? Just watch a little television, listen to 'with it' music, go to some movies and pick up some of the tabloids at the grocery counter and you'll see the human brain stem has suffered no melt-down. But that 3-pound blob on top of it, the seat of intelligence, is evidently just filling up space.
What is primarily responsible for making and holding neural connections is not what we can beat into our kids with rules, instructions and performance pressures, but what they experience around them. At least 95% of the imprinting a child receives, neither the child nor the parents are aware of. Who we are emotionally, ethically and intellectually at our core in our day-to-day routines as parents ? not what we pretend or preach ? is picked up by the child as its most important lessons and is then 'neural connected.' So telling a child to be something we are not doesn't work. If we want better children, then we must be better people.
This also speaks to the importance of a loving and nurturing family nest. We learn love, in large part, by experiencing it. The erosion of the family in our libertine society thrusts the child into a peer group for imprinting. This begins with technological births in hospital wards, then continues with isolating infants in their own bedrooms, pseudofood in bottles with nipples, television, day-care, broken homes and on to public schooling?you know, the 'modern' way to rear kids. The premature unfolding of development is accelerated through exposure to adult themes pressing in from everywhere in our society. Menstruation is beginning in 8-year-old girls (partly the result of hormone-type pollutants in food), there is an outbreak of pregnancies in 9-year-olds, and violent sex crimes among children under the age of 10 are becoming common. Children are being thrust into full operational adult thinking way before they are capable of handling it properly. That is why some 70% of teenagers are functionally illiterate: they may be able to learn, but cannot grant meaning. They have not been properly imprinted, don't have sufficient life experience for context and don't have the neural connections.
So yes, the home, family and parents are responsible for the development of children. On the other hand, there is a lot of nature involved too. Any parent raising a child into adulthood will see that the child at 40 is pretty much identical to the child in earliest infancy. So don't be too quick to blame yourself for a child gone bad. Don't spend your fortune in therapy either, whining about how your parents didn't love you. We can lose important neural connections in childhood but once you realize who you are ? very early in childhood ? the ball is ultimately in your court. There are people with essentially no brain in their skull (compressed to a thin membrane from hydrocephalus) who excel intellectually and ethically. So, as an adult, buck up, take responsibility for yourself and make good use of the neural connections remaining. That's in your court. You are not a victim.
But the present circumstances for children are a peculiar situation with no historical precedent. There is no solution other than for the adults to not be distracted by the veneer of civilization, its glamour of modernity, and its amoral and libertine pressures. Even though we are left with 1% of our mental potential, we can make a lot of good use of that. It means reaching inside for the goodness that is there in our hearts and extending that to our fellow humans. It means not following the conscience of others but learning what is already within and being true to it. Children don't need money, videos, signature shoes and pressure for grades and sports performance. The inner needs of children don't care about being raised in a pigpen so long as there is love. If that critical emotional relationship is not there, children will seek it in peers, including the perverted, money grubbing, media models. Then we have the ethically blind (other children, brainless idols and profiteering media) leading our blind children. This is the proper incubator for the adults of the future? What then, particularly when everyone has been indoctrinated into thinking they are victims and any failure in life is the fault of somebody else? What a formula for the collapse of society!
The answer is that greatest of all intelligences, love. That is not a platitude. Love requires an expansive and wise mind. Even with the puny 1% of our brain that we use, the capacity for love is infinite. In the end, what else really matters anyway? In the process, by being a person of goodness and reaching out in this way to others, we become the perfect model for the development of a loving and well-adjusted child. And hardly a word needs to be spoken in the process.
Dr. Wysong is a former veterinary clinician and surgeon, college instructor in human anatomy, physiology and the origin of life, inventor of numerous medical, surgical, nutritional, athletic and fitness products and devices, research director for the present company by his name and founder of the philanthropic Wysong Institute. He is author of The Creation-Evolution Controversy now in its eleventh printing, a new two volume set on philosophy for living, several books on nutrition, prevention and health for people and animals and over 15 years of monthly health newsletters. He may be contacted at Wysong@Wysong.net and a free subscription to his e-Health Letter is available at http://www.wysong.net
Learning responsibility is an ever widening and lifelong process.As thinking,... Read More
On one of her quarterly visits to see her grandson,... Read More
For most children, it is easy to learn to read... Read More
The internet is a dangerous place for your children. Don't... Read More
The Internet, is magnificent in its resources for families. Educational... Read More
Dear Sir, It was with some interest that I read... Read More
For many years underparenting was perhaps the biggest problem facing... Read More
The purpose of this article is to address some of... Read More
An address given by Rev. David B. Smith... Read More
They Spur Members To Grow EmotionallyTatiana Tannenbaum grappled with a... Read More
The back-to-school shopping is done. Brand new pencils, colored markers,... Read More
The No Child Left Behind Act of 2001 is making... Read More
Would you like your child to be the best that... Read More
Be aware. You may become totally overwhelmed when you get... Read More
Parents are in a unique position to "monitor" their children's... Read More
What parent hasn't gone into a son's or daughter's room... Read More
Although it's hard to say when the first stuffed dogs... Read More
Just as every snowflake is unique, so is every child.... Read More
Unfortunately each year many young children drown in swimming pools,... Read More
How to Get Your Child to Love Reading was conceived... Read More
It was a hot summer day in august and The... Read More
I have always been aware of my number one weakness:... Read More
Q. My daughter has gotten very good at manipulating us,... Read More
Beyond cases reported to authorities, little knowledge exists on the... Read More
Home schooling. What is it? What does it mean to... Read More
Child Safety Restraints and children in work vehiclesIf you take... Read More
Having a babysitter take care of your kids is sometimes... Read More
Get into their world. The world that teens are growing... Read More
I know as a single parent or even with 2... Read More
Public education in the United States has never been equal... Read More
Although nothing anybody says can ever completely prepare a woman... Read More
Choosing a good car seat for your child's protection is... Read More
Does the homework battle so typical with your hyperactive or... Read More
Q: Whenever we tell my daughter "no," she just bugs... Read More
Many research studies have shown the overall effectiveness of stimulant... Read More
One of the most prevalent problems of the computer age... Read More
Non-compliance is the family therapist's big word for your child... Read More
In the last 20 years we've all been introduced to... Read More
Young people generally want to fit in to their various... Read More
How on earth can you help your family cope with... Read More
Every school year parents and students dutifully trudge through the... Read More
"Life consists not in holding good cards but in playing... Read More
When it's time to put your child into a daycare... Read More
1 "Law of Belonging": The greatest need of teenagers (after... Read More
Ever feel like you're out of the loop when it... Read More
1) It's not my (pot, beer, cigarettes, etc.), I'm just... Read More
In the news, we hear and see an increasing number... Read More
Paula's last child had just gone off to college and... Read More
It's no joy to be sick. It's even less joy... Read More
Arabella Greatorex, owner of The Natural Nursery, reports on the... Read More
Are you looking for the Ultimate Airplane Themed Party Games... Read More
Recess has begun disappearing in states all around the country.... Read More
Everyone loves penguins. And now, everyone has a chance to... Read More
Summer Survival The... Read More
'Whose room is it anyway?'If you have a teenager, you're... Read More
I have always been aware of my number one weakness:... Read More
1. The Law of the BeastAs parents we need to... Read More
Did you know that many people retire broke?It's true. After... Read More
Most of us recognize the continuing escalation of violence around... Read More
Many people consider plush toys great for children. They say... Read More
It may seem obvious to many people why literacy is... Read More
I had just completed a session with 17-year old Julie... Read More
The teenage years are a crucial time in a child's... Read More
If there are any parents reading this who are thinking... Read More
After giving up my profession to become a wife, a... Read More
Are you a frustrated parent who sometimes finds it is... Read More
Parenting |