The Thing with Quality Time

It's funny how people seem to think that they have spent quality time with their kids after work by bringing them out to the mall for a lifeless and meaningless stroll only to come home with nothing more than a whole bunch of stuff that they (or the kids) don't need. In fact, time has been wasted because kids don't NEED you to bring them out to the shopping mall to waste time. They want and NEED to be with you.

It's really funny because I used to think taking my kids out for a very casual window-shopping trip was meaningful too until someone pointed out to me that my kids were STILL closer to someone else (their daycaregiver) when compared to me. I mean, what is it with kids, anyway? I take them out, don't I? I try my best to give them whatever they want. I buy them presents, don't I? They have more clothes than me, don't they?

But here's the sad part?.that's not quality time.

Quality time with your kids is just staying home with absolutely nothing to do, just lolling around on the carpet watching 'Blue's Clues' or 'Sesame Street' together giving each other nonchalant kisses and exchanging hugs (and repeated reviews about the show). Spending quality time with the kids involve nothing more than just CONNECTING with the kids, not spending detached moments of dis-connectivity loitering through unfamiliar places. It's about spending time connecting with the kids when you KNOW you've GOT SOMETHING ELSE BETTER TO DO.

I spent one whole Friday thinking about what to do with the kids on Saturday and Sunday and end up with nothing. So, on the weekends, we spent hours in front of the TV coloring bananas, gorillas, and calculator on pieces of paper. We, then, took the bicycle to the park and cycled around. Joshua got scrapes on his knees and Jared was more than unhappy with the fact that his big brother made more 'sand castles' in the park than he did ? but we all came home knowing that we knew each other better.

You see, spending quality time with the kids is all about getting to know your kids. Making an effort to be there for them when you know you CAN be doing something else with your life. We know we can use that time to actually finish off the report or call that important client up ? but the most important thing with quality time with kids is that we DON'T.

© Marsha Maung 2005
Please feel free to reprint this article anywhere in your website, magazine, ezine, or other types of publications for free. Please note that you should keep the byline in tact and please provide links back to the web addresses provided in the byline. Thanks.

Marsha Maung is a freelance graphic designer and copy writer who works from home. She designs apparel and premium items at http://www.creativejooz.com and http://www.allmomstuff.com and is the author of "Raising little magicians", and the popular "The Lance in freelancing". More information can be found at http://www.marshamaung.com

---

Discipline on My Mind

I look out of the window as I am writing... Read More

MORAL ARMORS Irrational Parenting, Part II

Handing Down Malignancy.Children may begin bright and eager to face... Read More

When Everybody Does It Comes Back to Haunt You

Parental example, whether for good or for bad, is undoubtedly... Read More

A Good Preschool Idea

The successful preschool idea behind many successful preschool learning centers... Read More

Character Education

Every parent wants their child to develop positive character traits.... Read More

Parenting

This article on parenting is by a practicing relationship counsellor/therapist,... Read More

Watch What You Say

"Now don't you go getting any ideas, Harold.""Don't you get... Read More

Develop Your Childs Genius: Improving Concentration and Focus

Some people can concentrate on an assignment, to the exclusion... Read More

Parenting Your Teenager: What to Do When Your Teen Feels Left Out

On a recent Saturday evening, I noticed a young teen-age... Read More

Teenagers and What Parents Should Do About Them

Chiladult? Whatever you call them, teenagers are a changin' and... Read More

Single Parents: Give Yourselves Credit

Single parents are not often thought of as good parents.I... Read More

Who Are You When the Professional In You Meets Baby?

Are you a professional?Notice how the questions differs from, "Do... Read More

Mommies and Me Special Time

Creating and making special memories with your child is very... Read More

Baptisms And Alternative Ways To Hold A Naming Ceremony

Traditionally, babies have been named at a christening/baptism.... Read More

7 Ways to Survive the Start of the School Year

It happens every year. Just when you are settled in... Read More

Is it ADHD or Bi-Polar Disorder?

Bi-Polar Disorder, or Manic Depression, is characterized by mood swings,... Read More

Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder: What Do We Mean by Attention Anyway?

When we talk about attention, we are talking about two... Read More

Fundraising For Your Preschool Or Daycare Center

Most day cares are non-profit organizations that must operate within... Read More

Parenting Your Teenager: Ask Questions

Many parents seem to be more than a little confused... Read More

Registering a Birth in Scotland

Who Can Register A Birth? The child's mother... Read More

Sometimes Our Childrens Questions Answer Our Own

I was changing Ford's diaper the other day when he... Read More

Raising Strong Daughters

When my daughter was born, I must admit there was... Read More

Potty Training Caveats- Dont Start Too Soon

The First Reason: For one thing, child development experts are... Read More

ParentingYour Teenager: Dont Buy the I Dont Know and I Dont Care Attitude

"I don't know and I don't care."I've heard those words... Read More

Guide Your Kids! This 3-D Map Leads to Character

A tall, weary-looking mother with glasses, walked into my counseling... Read More

Parents Demand Dumbed-down Tests:An Unintended Bad Consequence of the No Child Left Behind Act

The No Child Left Behind Act of 2001 is making... Read More

How to Talk to Your Kids About Suicide: New Study Says it May Make Them Less Likely to Consider It!

This year alone, 1,600 teenagers aged 15 to 19 will... Read More

Every Mom Worries

Sitterphobe "I never have a second to myself," this mother... Read More

The Classic ADHD Child Reminds Me of Tigger

ADHD comes in differenty forms, or types. What... Read More

Breaking the Cycle of Emotional Blackmail

Family decision-making is an intriguing phenomenon. Many factors become part... Read More

Is Your Child Learning Nothing?

You send your child to school and the teachers teach... Read More

Use Encouragement Instead of Criticism to Help Children Improve

Criticism is punitiveOur children judge themselves on the opinions we... Read More

Public Schools Can Cripple Your Childrens Ability To Read

For many adults, reading a book or newspaper seems effortless.... Read More