Three Phases to Email Sensitivity

The neurophysiological dynamics of understanding each email message are very complex. From that complexity, three basic phases float to the top that you will want to become familiar with. I like to label these: (1) the association phase, (2) the connection phase, and (3) the reaction phase. Let us look at each of these, and how the writer and reader can assume a more active role.

In the Association Phase, the sender's words are read and converted to an image in the reader's mind, optimally the same image the writer held in his mind. Sometimes, the writer's words lack enough information and the recipient cannot grasp the image. The word count has nothing to do with the creation of an image. I have read long emails that dance around any possibility of creating an image even if the recipient could read between the lines.

The first question I ask myself when receiving an email is: "Is what they are saying giving me enough information so I can form a clear image?" If not, I ask, "Am I in an open space at the moment to translate this image?" Sometimes, when pressed for time or there's too many thoughts swirling in my head, the space isn't available. If not in the right space, I move the email to a "to be read later" subfolder, and schedule a follow-up time to reread.

Later, after returning, and in a good space to reread, and the image is still not appearing, I send a reply email to the sender asking for clarity. My language usually goes something like this: "Thank you for your email. I have read it several times and can't seem to form a clear image of what you are asking. Could you please ask again in a different way so that I can give it my full attention and respect it deserves?"

If the email covers several subjects that were confusingly intermixed, I will also include some additional language like this: "When I write emails with various topics, I find it beneficial to create separate topic titles that focus on what comes next. Could you possible do this to add to the clarity?"

It is the sender's responsibility to convert their image into words. The right words that the reader can transform back into the same image given. Don't take on the writer's responsibility, or make assumptions, it only leads to miscommunication. If you do, the image they form of you will be off kilter and negative.

The Connection Phase. When writing your response, you will want to make sure the reader receives a clear image of what you are sending as well.

This means that your words need to match the return image you want to convey. If the topic is about apples, you do not want to add an orange in the middle of the apple image. Match apples to apples first because that was responding to the original image.

If you need to add an orange for topic support, place the information after the apple discussion in order not to distort the original image. This lets the receiver digest the apple and then tells them that another image is about to come. Their mind will prepare the space for the new image. When offering the orange, tell them the purpose of the orange and why you are adding the image. This way the reader knows to open a new file.

Another question I like to ask myself, after writing and before sending, one you might like to use, "Will the reader be able to file the image I'm sending in the same folder they began with?"

Our brains file information just as if we were dropping files in a filing cabinet manner.

Instead of just telling the reader, show the reader the image, and what folder to tuck their image in. The reader is expecting this answer. If they don't receive it, they wonder what to do with the image, it doesn't match any file in their cabinet. This splits their focus, slows down their connection, or can even halt the connection in toto.

I am sure you have your own favorite topic transition phrases; here are seven of my own. When you give these transition phrases a line of their own, the receiver's brain acts quickly to note an orange is coming.

1. Let me guess what you might be thinking. 2. As odd (unusual) as it may seem... 3. I am not at all surprised. 4. There's a story that goes with this, and I will get to this in the next paragraph. 5. Let me see if I can make this a little easier. 6. Its hard to believe, but... 7. In other words,...

The Reaction Phase. Writing an email response is not the same as speaking to that person. You don't have the immediate feedback from their body language, their silence, or huh when it isn't clear. Connecting via email with its time lapse also causes difficulty. You experience the same thing when you call, leaving a voice mail, and the party returns your call days later. If you don't state in the voice mail what you are calling about, or the person doesn't restate the purpose when they call back, your mind takes moments looking for the appropriate filing cabinet and file. Sometimes I receive a response back several weeks later and the original email I wrote isn't included. Then I must stop think or even hunt for the original email. A very time consuming process.

I find it best to begin a returning response with a "this is where we left off" paragraph. Don't assume the reader still holds the previous image in their mind. They don't. Many images came and went during that space and the previous email sits in their in box, file folder, or cabinet or worse dismissed due to lack of connection, in order to continue their processes.

It is important to reread the email before hitting send. Not just for grammar or spelling but to see that you convey the right image. It is the time to ask, "Did I convey the appropriate image with a file folder connection?" If yes, hit send.

(c) Copyright 2005, Catherine Franz. All rights reserved.

Catherine Franz, a eight-year Certified Professional Coach, Graduate of Coach University, Mastery University, editor of three ezines, columnist, author of thousands of articles website: http://www.abundancecenter.com blog: http://abundance.blogs.com

---

What?s the Value of an E-mail Address?

Although it may not be practical to put a dollar-sign... Read More

How To Get People To Constantly Open Your e-Mail Promotions Or Your Newsletter

In this article I'm going to talk strictly from a... Read More

Use the ?Reply All? Function in Email Judiciously

Type "email etiquette" into the search bar of any popular... Read More

5 Things You NEED to Know About Your AOL 9.0 Subscribers

In Fall 2003, America Online (AOL) released its brand new... Read More

Essential Rules For Effective Email Marketing

If you want an email campaign to succeed, you don`t... Read More

Effective Email Marketing

I've been sending out email camapigns for clients for over... Read More

Guideline to Hiring an Email Marketing Company

A common practice in today's e-commerce environment is to use... Read More

Ten Tips to Building Your Opt-in List.

To build and maintain your opt-in list requires constant attention.As... Read More

Having an Opt In List As an Affiliate Marketer Is Crucial

What is an Opt-in List and what is its significance... Read More

What Is An Open Rate

Good thing in emarketing business today is that many people... Read More

Email Microtargeting

Email marketing is undergoing rapid changes. Now, more than ever,... Read More

Tips to Build Your Email Address Database

WHY BUILD YOUR EMAIL ADDRESS DATABASE? Gaining your customers' email... Read More

Creative and Profitable Ways to Use Autoreponders

An interested visitor who has been strolling through your site... Read More

Email and Newsgroup Etiquette

Email EtiquetteIn order to effeciently communicate on the Internet it... Read More

Raid Your Autoresponder Attic For Content

Why you need new website content.Finding or creating good content... Read More

Dont Attach That!

The topic of sending attachments by e-mail is not one... Read More

The Key (Board) to Success: Effective Emailing

Email is THE medium of communication for business transactions. Unfortunately,... Read More

Email: When You Dont Get a Response

The lack of an email response is an issue I... Read More

The Gold Is In Your Mailing List

Let me ask you a question, "What is the most... Read More

10 Persuasive Triggers To Plug Into Your Ad

1. Most people want to win over others. Tell your... Read More

Email Marketing and Web Communication: Ten Key Tips to Get Your Messages Read

There's an old saying 'Manners maketh the man (or woman)'... Read More

The Lazy Mans Way To Building a Massive List In Minimum Time

As you read every word of this article, you'll be... Read More

To Get Your Email To Stand Out From All The Junk

We know that email marketing is a cheap method to... Read More

Building Relationships Takes Time: Overcoming the Overnight Surge Urge

Whenever we talk to a new or a "we hope... Read More

Twelve Tips for Successful Opt-in E-mail Newsletters

An opt-in e-newsletter is one of the most effective marketing... Read More

Lesson #3: Capitalize on Your Captures!

One of the underlying benefits of smart autoresponders is that... Read More

How To Avoid Having Filters Eat Your Emails

You've probably read 1000 times that "the money's in the... Read More

Is Your Email Address Blacklisted?

A lady emailed me yesterday very upset over the fact... Read More

9 Tips To Help You Write More Powerful Emails

1. Make the effort to learn about the etiquette (these... Read More

Hot List-Building Tips

Here are some hot list-building tips for you to grow... Read More

Keep Your Work From Home Newsletter From Being A Spam Filter Casualty

It's hard to get your email through to clients, friends... Read More

Choose The Right Business For You In Less Than 15 Minutes

3 Characteristics Of "The Right Business" ModelThe business must service... Read More

Whats on YOUR Subscriber Thank-You Page?

When I coach my clients on how to... Read More