Wanted: Treadmill for an Elephant
Maggie, the 22 year-old African elephant, has been a resident of the Alaska Zoo since 1983. The Zoo recently decided that Maggie needs nicer quarters, more attention, and a treadmill. She weighs 9,100 pounds and does not get enough exercise, especially during the long Alaskan winter months.Alaska Zoo officials debated... Read More
The Hidden Driveway
I won't lie: there are a lot of things I want in life, and some of them I'd even pay for. Rather than listing them in some aimless order so that I can feel bad about not having these things, I will instead focus on one thing that is actually... Read More
The Work-from-home Fashion Primer
Last week, I reported how writers, stay-at-home parents and online marketing geeks had chosen careers as hermits:http://www.thehappyguy.com/hermit.htmlThousands of work-from-home hermits responded, confessing that they were wearing their pajamas while reading my column. Fortunately very few sent me photos. Here are some of the questions they asked:Q: Is it... Read More
A Lawyers Favorite Lawyer Jokes
Lawyer JokesQ: How does a pregnant woman know she is carrying a future lawyer?A: She has an extreme craving for baloney.Q: What is the legal definition of "Appeal"?A: Something a person slips on in a grocery store.Q: Why did God make snakes just before lawyers?A: To practice.Q: What do you... Read More
Cant Get There From Here
Can't Get There From Here Juneau is the capital of Alaska, but did you know that you cannot drive there from anywhere? You can fly into Juneau or you can take a... Read More
A Dogs Guide To... Getting Your Dog to Stop Barking
I like to bark. I mean, I like to bark A LOT. So, whattya gonna do about it? Well, if you're Amber and Terry, you're going to do NOTHING about it. Ain't nobody going to silence the Rubinman, you know what I'm sayin'? If you're NOT Amber and Terry, though... Read More
Computers According to Carol
A is for Anti-Virus: she got it from my Uncle.B is for Backup: always look in your rear view mirror first.C is for Caddy: part of computer that holds a coffee cup.D is for Defrag: a popular dance in the 1920's.E is for Email: post office talk for express mail.F... Read More
Very Precise Fortune Cookies
I cracked open the fortune cookie and read the little slip of paper on the inside. Immediately I realized that it had been written by a weather forecaster."You will be approached in the late afternoon by a pink polka-dot octopus..."It continued on the other side: "... and asked to provide... Read More
Do Americans Really Understand Irony?
Let me start by saying that 'I am an American' Ok, there I have admitted it. But let me go on to make myself slightly more unpopular by suggesting that our American society does present us with a range of valuable and positive aspects. (no ? I am not being... Read More
Lactose Intolerant? It could be a good thing
Lactose Intolerant Individuals may prove a bonus in Space Missions. Lactose intolerant individuals have huge problems with gas from the inability to process certain dairy products and foods. Therefore such an individual after eating will create gas, methane, which could be used as fuel. There are methane based fuel cell... Read More
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Eye Spy Potatoes
Lately I've had the problem of falling asleep with my... Read More
Valet Parking: Theft with Consent
This column is long overdue. To put it in library... Read More
The Spare Parts Gremlins
Don't you just love getting a little something extra? Sure... Read More
Military Wives
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Its All About Seeing the Signs
Ace of Base hasn't seen the sign for quite some... Read More
Laughing Toward Truth: Six Tips for Lighthearted Thinkers
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Dumb Luck
I've never really thought of myself as being funny. I... Read More
How to Build a Cobblestone House
He huffed and he puffed and he blew the house... Read More
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Maybelle Misfire Joins Mega Corp
To: Maybelle Misfire From: I. M.. Power, VP Welcome aboard!... Read More
A Lawyers Favorite Lawyer Jokes
Lawyer JokesQ: How does a pregnant woman know she is... Read More
If Real People Ran the Bank - I (a spoof for the heart)
Banish Loans ForeverIf ordinary, hard-working, people ran the bank... the... Read More
Wanted: Treadmill for an Elephant
Maggie, the 22 year-old African elephant, has been a resident... Read More
When Humans and Dogs Collide: Negotiations for Todays Changing Times
This morning I decided to find myself. I originally looked... Read More
Setting History Straight
Have you ever heard the name Will Schwenk? Or the... Read More
Got Originality?
There are many ways to be original these days. But... Read More
Computers According to Carol
A is for Anti-Virus: she got it from my Uncle.B... Read More
[Not So] Outgoing Mail
I am currently perplexed by the concept of outgoing mail.... Read More
Local Author Joins History and Humor To Tell His Stories
Joseph Yakel was born and raised in New York's Capital... Read More
The Language of Appalachia
Imagine my surprise when I went to Jamaica a few... Read More
Freudian Slippage
Saturday morning. I went, in the early morning, to the... Read More
Cheer-Leadership or All I Need to Know About Business I Learned from Cheerleading
Thanks to teen movies, many people have this stereotypical idea... Read More
Cloning Advantage Super Families
As the cloning debate of humankind continues we find ourselves... Read More
If, An Online Marketers Internet Addiction Poem, Can You Relate to This?
IF, An Online Internet Marketing PoemIf before you have turned... Read More
Very Precise Fortune Cookies
I cracked open the fortune cookie and read the little... Read More
25 Reasons You Might Need to Wear a Welding Helmet
A welding helmet is a safety device worn for protection... Read More
Essential Laughter
Take time to laugh at yourself and the ridiculous in... Read More
Norm Goldman Interviews Comedienne Fran Capo,the Guinness Book Worlds Record for the Fastest Talking
Today, Norm Goldman, Editor of Sketchandtravel & Bookpleasures is delighted... Read More
The Army Corp of Engineers Having Issues Fixing Breach
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Saving SpongeBob Using High Tech
Put Active RFID Satellite Tags in SpongeBobsSpongeBob has been in... Read More
Important Safety Tip$
I was given a list of Do's and Don'ts of... Read More
Dog Poo - And You Thought You Had Problems
In Southern Germany in a town by the name of... Read More
Short Story: Take a Trip To The Temple Of The Great Tomato
Jimmy Jenkins Jr. is not an adventurer, traveler, or pioneer.... Read More
Slip-sliding On A Peel
Every day, or at least every other day, we make... Read More
Restaurant Manager Gives Out Sexual Favors As Performance Bonus, Raise
While many restaurant workers worry and sweat in anticipation of... Read More
Maybelle Misfire Joins Mega Corp
To: Maybelle Misfire From: I. M.. Power, VP Welcome aboard!... Read More
Starbucks Going into Hilton
Well, I hope you did not read that headline wrong,... Read More
To See Or Not To See
I went to the eye doctor the other day. I... Read More
I Got to Play an April Fools Joke Before I was Born
I will start this by saying that yes, I did... Read More
The Army Corp of Engineers Having Issues Fixing Breach
The Army Corp of engineers is having a tough time... Read More
[Not So] Outgoing Mail
I am currently perplexed by the concept of outgoing mail.... Read More
Mexican Spaminator
When we decided to move to Mexico, one of the... Read More
Marines Dont Take Crap
We... Read More
Nine Movies That Make You Want To Yell, Stop Saying That
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Internet is My True Agent
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Sweet Vengeance Purrfected
I love animals but cats are my favorites. There's just... Read More
Military Wives
I... Read More
Cant Get There From Here
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Its All About Seeing the Signs
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Humans are like Monkeys
Humans think much like monkeys and other primates, not much... Read More
Wanted: Treadmill for an Elephant
Maggie, the 22 year-old African elephant, has been a resident... Read More
Poor Rixs Almanac 8-27-05
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Health Club Regulars ?- Some of the People Youre Likely To Meet at the Gym
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Humor Quotations - Top 35 Funny Quotations by Famous Comedians
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Thanks to teen movies, many people have this stereotypical idea... Read More
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If you ever saw Aristophanes live on stage, you must... Read More
The Hidden Driveway
I won't lie: there are a lot of things I... Read More
A Lawyers Favorite Lawyer Jokes
Lawyer JokesQ: How does a pregnant woman know she is... Read More
How to Build a Cobblestone House
He huffed and he puffed and he blew the house... Read More
Bad Days and Bad Timing
Have you ever noticed how family members always misbehave at... Read More
Eye Spy Potatoes
Lately I've had the problem of falling asleep with my... Read More
How To Get Attention, or: As You Read This, You Feel an Irresistible Urge to Go On Reading!
We all want attention. As children we crave the attention... Read More
If, An Online Marketers Internet Addiction Poem, Can You Relate to This?
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