God must love Top Ten lists because she made so many of them. They crowd my Inbox daily. They're right up there in popularity with offers to refinance my house and stock up on Viagra. Top Nine Lists are few and far between and Top Eleven lists unheard of. But for seem reason there seem to be ten nifty answers to pretty much any problem or life situation you can come up with.
In search of my own Top Ten favorites I had a hard time coming up with something that hadn't already been worked over. There seems to be a plethora of Top Ten lists designed to pump us up; increase our confidence and build self esteem. I thought it would be nice to let some of the air out. So here are my:
Top Ten Things to Build a Bridge and Get Over.
1. Nobody knows why anybody does anything. Imagine the time this one will free up. You don't need to figure out what happened to Aunt Bertha as a child to make her so mean and crabby; why your s.o. dumped you; why your neighbor ignores you. We humans are a product of our upbringing; environment, genetics and hormones. We do what we do when we do it. Let it go. Don't take it personally.
2. Nobody owes you a thing. When you think about all the time, love and attention it took to get where you are today you'll see that you can never repay the debt. Your mother and father who raised you; your teachers who pushed and believed in you; your friends who supported you; your community which nurtures you. Question is ? what have you given back in return?
3. You'll be balanced when you're dead. Not a moment sooner. Balance schmalanace. We chase it like the Holy Grail. What's the big deal if you work too hard some weeks and goof off others? If you're passionate about something maybe you'd rather have more of it in your life. Your kids won't knock over a bank if you miss a few softball practices. Exercise is overrated and TV's not evil incarnate
4. Multi-tasking is an oxymoron. Don't be intimidated by colleagues who do five things at once. Studies on "Attentional Blink" show that we don't actually do more than one thing at a time. We switch our attention rapidly between projects. A one man band plays many instruments passably but none well. Better to be a maestro than a journeyman.
5. You don't deserve anything you have. See # 2. Entitlement is a very unattractive quality. No matter how hard you worked or how much you planned you were never in control of the outcome of your efforts. God and luck and the support of others, along with your own hard work, played big parts.
6. You're ordinary. Relax it's a compliment. Ordinary people are reliable, industrious and consistent . Superstars are a pain in the rear especially when they read their own press. Who would you rather call at 2 AM when your car breaks down - Tony Robbins or your brother-in-law Al? Imagine the ride home.
7. You're not a victim you're a volunteer. (Unless we're talking about a trainwreck or a typhoid epidemic). The old saw about nobody being able to take advantage of you without your permission is true. If you don't want something to happen in your life don't set it up in the first place.
8. You're right. Life isn't fair. But it's always interesting and instructive if you keep an open mind.
9. There is no meantime. No place where time stands still and standards are lowered and second best is good enough. There's only now. What are you going to do now?
10. Gratefulness is second to Godliness. Cleanliness is waaay down the list. Get down on your knees and look at your life. Oh, the places you'll go!
Mary Rosendale is a writer, speaker and Founder of "The Constructed Life" - a unique Holistic Coaching service rooted in Buddhist psychology. If you liked this article you'll love her free newsletter. Visit her on the web at http://www.TheConstructedlife.com to sign up for it.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|


A new definition of retirement is evolving. It's one that's... Read More
Helen Keller once remarked that there was one thing she... Read More
I must confess, I laughed when I saw that Maria... Read More
Ellen was brought up to be invisible. She was taught... Read More
Terms like Postpartum, Post Traumatic and Post Gulf War are... Read More
Would you agree that today most of us have the... Read More
Small talk used to be really hard work for me.... Read More
1. Pretending You Are Interested When You Are NotDo yourself... Read More
Of the 60,000 people who lived to be over 100... Read More
A large percentage of business are stuck, tied to narrow... Read More
I thought it might be worth visiting some email etiquette... Read More
Most people have no idea where their money goes. They... Read More
The subject of positive self talk regarding our goals and... Read More
Have you ever noticed that so many of us who... Read More
Online counseling may be the latest and greatest improvement in... Read More
Imagine stepping into the gym for the first time in... Read More
Spirituality coaching is more than creating goals and holding someone... Read More
Being a lifelong student, I am regularly attending seminars etc.... Read More
A coach is an essential figure in providing direction and... Read More
There is a point at which everything becomes simple and... Read More
Have you ever thought about how sheep get lost? Even... Read More
Immediately post second world war W Edwards Deming went to... Read More
Today an increasing number of us are experiencing burnout, low... Read More
You are going to meet a very important client for... Read More
Do you start your day with anger, frustration and annoyance... Read More
We all need to decide whether to "play it safe"... Read More
If you are wondering whether investment in executive coaching would... Read More
Have you ever found yourself in a hurry to leave... Read More
Do you ever get an uncomfortable feeling in your stomach... Read More
IntroductionThe question for leaders in organizations today is how do... Read More
God must love Top Ten lists because she made so... Read More
This story is being offered in response to a request... Read More
Direct Answers - Column for the week of July 29,... Read More


What do you do when fear shows up? Do you... Read More
An recent article in Money Magazine said that "A coach... Read More
Can you hear your compassion? It's time to crank it... Read More
Having excellent persuasion skills is one of the most important... Read More
'Have you read the Art of War?' someone asked me... Read More
Are you one of those folks that needs to figure-it-out... Read More
MOVING THROUGH CHANGECreating any major change in our lives can... Read More
Being a lifelong student, I am regularly attending seminars etc.... Read More
If you've been around the Internet for more than two... Read More
Small talk used to be really hard work for me.... Read More
You Are What You Listen ToCan music really help you... Read More
I've told people for a long time that one of... Read More
Sound familiar? If you want to manage anger, the only... Read More
There are many parts that make up you.There's the Musical... Read More
With the growing number of expert business people, consultants and... Read More
Taking control of your life is getting in touch with... Read More
The purpose of life is to live a life of... Read More
Laughter may or may not be a shock, relieved, but... Read More
We live in a world of rapid change and uncertainty.... Read More
Every human feels anxiety on occasion; it is a part... Read More
What's the alternative to making decisions?Allowing someone else, or circumstances,... Read More
Athletes the world over have coaches. Yet, workers whose very... Read More
It's past bedtime for most working men. It's not unbearably... Read More
I have been a member of a group called the... Read More
"The indispensable first step to getting the things you want... Read More
Did you know that the area that you call your... Read More
Preparation: If you desire advertising the group, announcements need to... Read More
Randall sought my help because he was stuck being miserable... Read More
This article is for those of you who coach or... Read More
Joey rises before dawn to pack his lunch, eager for... Read More
As the last day of school arrives I feel the... Read More
For adults with Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD), details are a... Read More
We don't change. I imagine such a statement could find... Read More
Coaching |