Copywriting Makeover: Making An Emotional Connection - Part 1 of 2

One statistic shows that over 80% of all buying decisions are emotional. That means your copywriting should be, too. This is something I firmly believe in and have preached for most of my copywriting career. However, all too often, I find people skipping the vital step of making an emotional connection with their customers. That can be a tragic, and costly, mistake.

Thats why I was excited when I had the opportunity to rewrite the homepage copy for a vacation cruise service. While the copy they used previously gave all the details and got them a good number of bookings, it just didnt have what it takes to make me start daydreaming about my next cruise. It didnt but it was about to!

The Problems

The previous copy on the Cruise Vacation Center home page faced a couple of challenges. (You can view the original copy at this link: http://www.copywritingcourse.com/CruiseVacationCenter-Original.pdf.) The copy was very company-oriented instead of customer-oriented. It talked about who Cruise Vacation Center (CVC) is, why the visitor should buy from them, and some wonderful benefits CVC offers its clients including excellent bargain rates and extra discounts. However, all the verbiage was geared toward the company. The customer was left out.

The home page copy also lacked emotion. It was very matter-of-fact. In addition to making visitors aware of the wonderful prices and deals CVC offered, I wanted to create a vision for the site visitors. I wanted to give them what they needed in order to float off into a daydream about fabulous ports-of-call; warm, gentle breezes; and thrilling adventures.

While I was painting a picture of the vacation of a lifetime, I also had to be sure to include a vital fact. CVCs business plan was set up to be most affordable for the customer when s/he booked online. Without sounding rude, I had to do everything in my power to get the site visitor to book their cruise vacation while at the site. This was an extremely important issue and a point that needed to be woven throughout the copy.

Lastly, the page had to uphold Cruise Vacation Centers excellent search engine rankings. They were ranked at the top of several major engines, and the rewritten copy couldnt jeopardize their positioning.

The Solutions

The first step was, without question, to woo the site visitors with delightful fantasies about their next vacation. My goal was to conjure up all sorts of visions in the minds of Cruise Vacation Centers visitors. I wanted the visitors to be dreaming of exotic places with lots of fun things to do, interesting sights to see, and 24/7 access to gourmet meals that rival any five-star restaurant. I wanted their blood pressure to drop 10 points just from reading about the onboard staff of hundreds who would pamper them with VIP treatment. After reading this copy, I wanted them ready to leave on vacation today! However, I also had to persuade them to book online rather than calling CVCs office.

During the rewrite, I had to carefully plan the use of their primary keyphrase, cruise vacation, so as not to disrupt their most reliable source of business the search engines. After all, there is a delicate balance between pleasing the search engines and appealing to site visitors.

If I leaned too much toward the search engine side of the equation, the conversion ratio of the home page would suffer. In other words, Cruise Vacation Center would get lots of visitors, but few of them would book cruises.

If I leaned too much toward the customer side of the equation, CVCs rankings would plummet, and they would need to find a new way to drive qualified traffic to their site. As is normally the case with SEO copywriting, balance was going to be vital.

In the conclusion to this two-part series, youll see how I handled the rewrite and what the end results of all the work were. Curious to see the new copy? Youll find it on CVCs site: You can see the new copy on CVCs site at http://www.cruisevacationcenter.com.

Karon Thackston © 2004

About The Author

Copy not getting results? Learn to write SEO copy that impresses the engines and your visitors at http://www.copywritingcourse.com. Be sure to also check out Karons latest e-report How To Increase Keyword Saturation (Without Destroying the Flow of Your Copy) at http://www.copywritingcourse.com/keyword.

IF PUBLISHING ON A WEBSITE, USE THIS RESOURCE BOX:

Copy not getting results? Learn to write SEO copy that impresses the engines and your visitors with The Step-by-Step Copywriting Course. Be sure to check out Karons latest e-report How To Increase Keyword Saturation (Without Destroying the Flow of Your Copy), too!

---

What Is Persuasive Copywriting And How Can It Help Your Business?

Persuasive copywriting is what draws the attention of prospective customers.... Read More

When Panic Attacks Writers

If you write for a living, you deal with deadlines.... Read More

How to Build Benefits from Features Fast and Easy with the Solution Approach

Every salesperson and fledgling copywriter hears the harangue: DON'T SELL... Read More

Headlines That Pull, Persuade and Propel!

When writing direct response copy, there are a few things... Read More

Better Copy: The Interview is the Key

Most of us spend our days persuading others to buy... Read More

How to Write for a Paper or Magazine

l. Introduce yourself to the editor of your local newspaper.... Read More

7 Big Ticket Copywriting Secrets I Learned from Ted Nicholas

I recently sponsored and attended Joel Christopher and... Read More

3 Copywriting Tips - How To Edit For Mass Appeal!

Web copy that's intended to sell or generate leads needs... Read More

16 Golden Rules of Master Copywriting

You could spend thousands of dollars on advertisement and have... Read More

Its the Headline, Stupid! - Writing Powerful Headlines

"It's the headline, stupid," is the sign that hangs over... Read More

Freelance Copywriters on the Internet: How to Tell the Difference Between Heaven-sent and Hack

If you're hunting for a good freelance copywriter and have... Read More

5 Critical Mistakes Most Freelance Copywriters Make

Think you have what it takes to be a freelance... Read More

How to Make the Most of Your Website Copywriter

Many people feel uncertain when dealing with copywriters. Like any... Read More

How To Take Your Freelance Writing Chances

Your initial freelance writing assignments are the best way to... Read More

Should You Use Testimonials When You Create A Web Site?

You've probably seen web sites with testimonials - they can... Read More

Dont Be Satisfied With Your First Draft

Sometimes it's a struggle to figure out what's the best... Read More

Writing Online In Two Syllables or Less

About once a month I fly off somewhere to give... Read More

Be That Copywriter Everyone Wants to Work With

So many copywriters think that it's enough to be a... Read More

Progressive Headlines Guide Customers To Buy

Headlines are, without a doubt, one of the most important... Read More

5 Rules for Effective Written Sales Communications

Most salespeople have great ideas, but when it comes to... Read More

To Start Making Cash from Your Online Writing, You Must Draw Blood First

Writers write just like painters, paint on canvas. This is... Read More

The One Word Every Prospect Craves

It's arguably the most important word in the copywriter's arsenal.... Read More

How to Develop a Killer News Hook

When you are going to write a press release probably... Read More

Promote Your Business and Get Paid for Doing It!

How can you gain credibility and exposure for you and... Read More

Sell Anything To Anyone On The Internet With Hypnotic Writing

I imagine you are the type of person who really... Read More

8 Tips for Writing Headlines that Grab Attention (and Keep Prospects Reading!)

Effective headlines make all the difference in whether your prospect... Read More

Can Honest Copywriting Succeed?

I confess--I'm a marketing heretic! I've built my career on... Read More

Killer Business Headline Templates - So How Do You Write Killer Headlines in Minutes? You Cheat!

According to Branding and Advertising legend, David Ogilvy: 5 times... Read More

Boost Your B to B Marketing Copy: 3 Major Copywriting Blunders and How to Correct Them

When you're writing or evaluating copy for a B to... Read More

Beyond Once Upon a Time: Fairy Tales arent the Only Thing Needing Catchy Openings

Once a upon a recent time in a galaxy not... Read More

Designing for a Non-English Audience

Having worked as a digital publishing specialist at a large... Read More

Top 8 Techniques - Secrets - Create Ad Copy For Your Business To Sky Rocket

Perhaps the most important benefit in the material that follows... Read More

3 Steps To Better Sales Copywriting

Whether you're wet-behind-the-ears or a seasoned copywriter, your craft will... Read More