Who Are You Mixing It With?

I talk and write a lot about Life Design ? creating and sculpting a life that is fulfilling for you. It is about shaping your personal landscape and environment.

Part of that environment involves being conscious of who you mix with and their effect on you. Beware of mixing with people who are consistently negative and critical, not only of themselves, but of others and their ideas.

It's okay to vent and get things off your chest occasionally, but the Value Vampires have turned this into a fine art! They planted seeds of doubt in your mind and then you started to water them! Don't tell them your hopes, aims, ambitions or goals too early, before they've had time to develop; they could kill it in infancy!

The Value Vampires are constantly whining and holding pity parties with anyone who is not aware enough to decline the invitation! They put you and your ideas down and typically ask questions like: "why do you want to do that for?" (which is really a negative judgement in disguise). Understand that when they do they often have a hidden, often unconscious agenda or a low opinion of themselves and their abilities.

Value Vampires drain you ? a night out with them leaves you with a nasty taste in your mouth and normally feeling much worse about things. As you begin to make changes in your life, then you'll probably find yourself attracted to different kinds of people and will not want to conduct your relationships, friendships with them anymore ? and they'll either change or leave your life.

How can you start to change this?

(i) Focus on building a positive support network ? rather than seeking to avoid the Value Vampires. You'll start from a more productive mindset and begin to think about who you want to be with and why.

(ii) You are what you attract. If you're constantly surrounded by and mixing with those who have a consistently negative approach to life, then it's very easy to discover who the biggest Value Vampire is ? look in the mirror!

Develop a more positive and proactive approach within yourself and you'll find that you are cultivating more positive and attractive relationships.

Copyright 2004 Julie Plenty

About The Author

Julie Plenty is a Personal and Business Coach who specialises in coaching self employed creative professionals to live more creative, fulfilled lives. To sign up for the Life Design newsletter visit: http://www.self-help-personal-development.com

---

What The Buddha Says About Coaches

There is a Buddhist saying that goes like this: "If... Read More

Being an Emotional Victim

None of us like to think of ourselves as victims.... Read More

A Fresh Look at the Choices We Make

We are frequently held back from making future plans or... Read More

After July 8, Pay This Amount

You undoubtedly go through this, too. A few times a... Read More

The Great Marketing Reframe

From grimaces to stomach knots, talking about marketing seems to... Read More

Whats Wrong with Life Coaching?

As a Life Coach I quickly identified most individuals wanted... Read More

Integrating Life and Work

Organizations are finally creating cultures that support a work and... Read More

3 Keys to Making Small Talk Easy to Do

Small talk used to be really hard work for me.... Read More

Invest Your Inner Wealth

It started out like any other Wednesday - reports to... Read More

Fear Is Nothing To Be Afraid Of!

What do you do when fear shows up? Do you... Read More

Make a Decision and Take Action!

How are you progressing with the goals you set yourself... Read More

Not Blind, Just No Vision

Helen Keller once remarked that there was one thing she... Read More

Successful Change Starts With A Shift In Perspective

Like so many in corporate America today, Susan needed more... Read More

An Easy Way to End The Year

As a healthy business owner or independent professional, how do... Read More

Walt Disney, the Inspiration to Form a Better Life?

You, like many others, may have come to this article... Read More

What is Life Coaching?

An recent article in Money Magazine said that "A coach... Read More

Think Twice Before Youre Nice

A few months back I had a disturbing dream. In... Read More

Change vs Transition

"There is a time for departure, even when there's no... Read More

Key Questions for a Coaching Conversation

There are 2 key skills that coaches need to be... Read More

The Biggest Loser

I am a "Loser". You're gonna learn from this writing... Read More

Mailey?s Introspections [Monday, December 6th 2005]

As I work with clients as their introspective Inner Peace/Relationship... Read More

Do You Want to Impress Others? Then Don?t Talk ?Listen

Recently my friend Michelle was concerned about a professional conference... Read More

The Value of Coaching to Support Your Business and Your Life

In our daily lives as well as in our businesses,... Read More

4 Amazing Tips To Successfully Persuade Anyone

Having excellent persuasion skills is one of the most important... Read More

Poise, Posture, and Performance

Good posture is seen to have many advantages. From an... Read More

Can Versus Cant

It is my personal opinion that there are two words... Read More

Do You Want to Make More Money as A Life Coach

There's a lot of coaches out there not making any... Read More

Let?s Say You?re a Dog. Are You So Competitive You?d Eat a Carrot?

Seems like a gal always learns something out on the... Read More

Permission To Have FUN

? Have you been working long hours? ? Have... Read More

Get Out What You Put In!

During a recent coaching session with Mark, I was briefly... Read More

Q-Tip It!

Back in the 1920's when Polish-American entrepreneur Leo Gerstenzang invented... Read More

How to Deal Effectively with Anxiety

Every human feels anxiety on occasion; it is a part... Read More

Life On The Receiving End Of Coaching

What is it like to be on the receiving end... Read More