Start Conversations as Easily as You Start a Car

Starting a car is easy. Put the key in, turn it, and the car starts. Would it not be great if starting a conversation was this easy? It can be--if you know how!

Unfortunately, many people don't know how. They struggle with starting conversations. If they do break the silence, the conversation sputters and dies.

This leads to boring parties, embarrassing silences, lack of friends and social skills. Not being able to easily start a conversation hinders business success and enjoyment in life. Do you know what I am talking about?

Starting a conversation can be as easy as starting a car. The reason you can quickly start a car is because you know the two steps:

Step 1: Put the key in the ignition

Step 2: Turn the key

These two steps work every time with virtually any car. So also there is a 2-step method for starting conversations. It will enable you to start conversation anywhere, anytime, with virtually anyone.

Here is the 2-step method for starting conversation:

Step 1: Break the silence

Step 2: Ask a good question

Simple is it not? Don't let the simplicity of the 2-step method fool you. It works! I have used the 2-step method with total strangers, friends, businessman, and even shy people with great success. Let me explain more.

1. Break the silence

A person cannot start a car until they put the key in the ignition, neither can a conversation start until the silence is broken. Generally, a greeting works great to break the silence.

"Hi Tom"

"Good morning"


There is a second way to break the silence and that is with a comment. This works well with strangers.

On a plane: "This has been a long delay."

To a clerk: "Looks busy today."

To a friend: "That was a good football game last night."

Now that the silence is broken, it is time to get the conversation flowing with the second step.

2. Ask a good question

Almost any question will work. In fact any question is better than dead silence. However, a good question will get the conversation moving. Here are a few examples:

"How are you doing today?"

"How was your week?"

"Where are you from?"

"How often do you fly?"

"What do you enjoy about this class?"

You might be thinking, "What if the conversation does not start after I ask a question?" This will sometimes happen. When it does, just remember the car illustration. Turn the key over again and ask another question. The conversion will eventually start.

That's it! Break the silence and ask a good question. Do this and you will be able to start a conversation as easily as you start a car.

--(C) Arlen Busenitz. Arlen is the author of "Conversation Magic: 7 Keys to Unlock your Ability to Conquer Shyness, Make Friends, and Confidently Talk with Anyone." Free tips and articles here:

About The Author

Arlen is a gifted writer and speaker.

In The News:

pen paper and inkwell

cat break through

Tips For Keeping Your Cool Before Your Presentation

Stretch to relax. Rise on your toes and reach for... Read More

Public Speaking Tips: Lessons From Former US President Ronald Reagan

If you want public speaking tips, what are the ten... Read More

Five Tips for Overcoming Public Speaking Nerves

Your mouth is dry, heart palpitating, and knees knocking. You... Read More

Trust in Training: Societys Effect on an Audience

It is important to be continually aware that a person... Read More

The Ten Habits of Highly Effective Speakers

Successful speakers do not do all the right things all... Read More

10 Tips for Better -- and Less Scary! -- Public Speaking

The fear of speaking in public is well-documented, often discussed,... Read More

The Best Practical Tips for Overcoming Stage Fright

As one who does some speech coaching, I have heard... Read More

Performance Feedback: Why Were Scared and How Not to Be

Effective communication is not a one-way street. It involves an... Read More

Conquer Presentation Anxiety: Olympic Athletes Show Us How

Whether going for the gold or giving a presentation, the... Read More

Be Brief!

Centuries ago great speakers often spoke two hours and more.... Read More

Internet Marketing and Public Speaking: Seven Steps to a Successful Murder Board

I recently posted an article providing tips on public speaking... Read More

So Youre Going to Make a Speech

What Do I Talk About?Start by asking yourself three questions:1.... Read More

Directing Voiceovers: Dont Be, Do!

Directing a voice-over talent you've hired to read a spot... Read More

Voice Coaching - Training Your Voice to Give Better Presentations

Picture a cool crisp autumn morning in the wide open... Read More

Top 7 Ways to Succeed in the Business of Speaking

How attractive are you as a speaker? No, your looks,... Read More

Getting Results from Your Writing & Speaking

When we communicate, we usually want something to happen. We... Read More

A Short Guide to Effective Public Speaking

Delivering an effective presentation to 20 or to 200 people... Read More

Let Your Appearance Speak for You, Not Against You!

Every 7 seconds another baby boomer turns 50. What does... Read More

Ten Speech Tips for Writing Powerful and Persuasive Presentation

Have you ever had to give a speech?Do you remember... Read More

How to Use Public Speaking to Attract Clients

When Robert Middleton moved his marketing consulting practice, Action Plan... Read More

Does Uptalk Make you Upchuck?

Uptalk is invading the work place and is reaching epidemic... Read More

Take The Fear Out Of Public Speaking

You're a bright, dynamic executive. You've been scheduled to give... Read More

Make Your Talks Pay: Have People Stand In Line Eager Give You Their Business Card

If you've ever been on stage, doing a talk or... Read More

Giving Presentations: Public Speaking Secrets in a Nutshell

A high level manager contacted me in a panic. He... Read More

Overcoming Your Fears of Public Speaking

You're waiting your turn to make a speech, when suddenly... Read More

Youre Making Me Nervous

Almost everybody is nervous when they stand up to speak.... Read More

Public Speaking Tips: The More You Know, The More It Will Flow - Tips For Knowing Your Audience

The more you know about your audience, the better your... Read More

Making Transitions

Ever notice how smoothly some speakers or writers move you... Read More

How to Use your Inner Circle

Who do you know that knows that you speak?There is... Read More

Opening Your Speech

Imagine yourself at mission control; 10, 9, 8, 7, 6,... Read More

Getting Yourself Known

What are the 5 best ways of getting known in... Read More

How To Make A Blue Ribbon Presentation Every Time

You can make a Blue Ribbon presentation each and every... Read More

Let Your Products Sell Your Name: For Public Speakers

Wouldn't it be great if you didn't have to be... Read More