Self-esteem: Who Do You Think You Are?

Are you the kind of person who dwells on your strengths, or the kind obsessed by your weaknesses? It's been said that you become what you think about most of the time. Continually pondering your strengths therefore makes you become stronger, enhancing self-esteem. Conversely, thinking constantly on your weaknesses makes you become weaker, draining whatever self-esteem you have.

Incidentally, self-esteem is all about who you think you are. Notice the word "think." Quite often it has nothing to do with reality. What we think of ourselves could be very far from the truth. The world is full of beautiful women who think they are ugly, thin ones thinking they are fat, men who have it all but think they need more?. I believe you could add to this list of ironies!

Self-esteem is all about what you think about you. Now, who or what do you think you are? Are you happy with your answer? If yes, you have healthy self-esteem; if no, your self-esteem is poor. A poor self-esteem could weigh you down in many areas of your life. It could cheat you out of promotions, contracts, relationships and much more. If you feel inadequate and undeserving, you will never fight for more in life. Why, you think you do not deserve what you presently have! If you feel unworthy of your loving spouse and children you could unconsciously hold back on loving them, fearing they might leave you sooner or later. You consequently maintain emotional distance, protecting yourself from anticipated hurt, alienating your loved ones in the process. Do you see how poor self-esteem could do its harm?

An unrealistically high opinion of yourself could be equally damaging, resulting in conceitedness, the other end of the continuum. Conceitedness destroys relationships, and consequently businesses and careers. Whether they are feelings of superiority, or of inferiority, an unhealthy self-esteem is damaging. It is therefore important to build and maintain a healthy self-image, where you think positively of your strengths and abilities but with humility, desiring to be a blessing through them.

By all means you should celebrate your strengths and successes. It is alright to feel good about them. We all have them, so do not be too self-effacing. If you were to make a list of things you are good at, that you get complimented for, and progress you have made in the last five years you may even find that you have not been fair to yourself; you may be more accomplished than you thought! Why not make such a list right now!

On the other hand, making a list of your weaknesses is not to burst your bubble. It is to highlight areas for further improvement. If these are things you cannot change, you will simply need to find a way around them. You certainly shouldn't work up a sweat about them! For instance, if you hate writing speeches, you could hire a speech writer. Not good with balancing the books? Get an accountant. And if you think you don't have a pretty face, you could focus on fitness, inner beauty, good grooming and manners. You could always find a hairstyle, a combination of colours, a style of clothing that down plays some features, highlighting others. So celebrate your strengths, work on your weaknesses; and enlist help wherever you need it!

If you made the list of your strengths, and the other of your weaknesses you will often find that your strong points more than make up for your weak ones. It therefore makes sense to dwell on what you've got rather than what you haven't. No one is perfect, but we are adequate for God's purpose. You have all it takes to be you. There is no reason to envy someone else. They need what they've got to be themselves, something you were not created to be.

So, dear friend, who do you think you are? Reel off those strengths in answer to this question and you will not be far from the truth. Think on your strengths, celebrate them and be thankful. Remember, it's all about who you think you are. And that is within your power.

Copyright 2005 Oma Edoja

Oma Edoja is a freelance writer, motivational speaker and publisher. She publishes an inspirational ezine, The Up-Mobile ezine, at http://up-mobile.blogspot.com. This article is excerpted from issue 5. Visit to see current issue. Subscribe now and get free booklet: Four Steps to Success -- Your easy-to-follow guide to getting what you want and keeping it by Oma Edoja

---

Get Some Attitude!

You've been looking for a job for as long as... Read More

How To Reduce Anxiety When Affirmations Dont Work

Have you ever read that you should think positively when... Read More

Overcoming Bad Moods

From experience, one of the biggest stumbling blocks for people... Read More

Change Your Thoughts And Your Life: 5 Simple Ways To Bring More Peace And Harmony To Your Life

When you change your thoughts, you change your life. The... Read More

Learning From Life

Do you ever find yourself thinking, "Life has taught me... Read More

Prisoner of Attitude

"Thinking is responsible for man's primacy on earth today. Existence... Read More

3 Ways to Change Roadblocks into Valuable Tools

Our initial reaction when hitting a setback or a "roadblock,... Read More

Short Cut to Self-Confidence: Say Yes to You!

You are the only one that can give confidence to... Read More

Garbage Words In - Garbage Thinking Out

"At birth, a baby's brain contains 100 billion neurons, roughly... Read More

How Much Better Can You Have It?

"If you don't like something, change it. If you can't... Read More

Look for the Positives

Our lives are overflowing with negative information from the newspapers,... Read More

Power of Positive Beliefs

I am an educator as well as a coach and... Read More

Your Best Defense Against Aging: Your Attitude To Life

In the international bestseller, Blink, Malcolm Gladwell explains how researchers... Read More

The Map Is Not the Territory

Just in an average day we can experience many things... Read More

Aging

Aging is a matter of the mind.The years may creep... Read More

Community After Tragedy

One Friday in November, I began a journey from New... Read More

You may be Shocked to Hear This

What I mean of course is, to appreciate life through... Read More

Change

One thing in life is certain---change. Things never stay the... Read More

Prescience

"The knowledge of actions or events before they occur; foresight."You... Read More

Financial Abundance And Peace Of Mind Are One!

There are only two emotions we can experience; love or... Read More

Positive Thought

The power of positive thoughts to affect one's experience of... Read More

Life Energy

There is a growing appreciation of the impact of psychic... Read More

10 Tips to Cope with Negative Emotions at Work

It's a fact of life - if you want to... Read More

10 Tips to Improve Your Self Esteem

Striving to improve our self esteem is on everybody's mind.... Read More

Our Worst Enemies

Most of us love to think that our problems are... Read More

The Power Of Appreciation

As we enter this holiday season, and this time of... Read More

Absence Makes The Fear Go Yonder!

Emotions are controlled by a combination of reason and action.... Read More

5 Proven Ways to Safely Make Positive Life Changes

One of the most important aspects of living a healthy... Read More

Is ADD Getting You Down? 6 Tips to Sharpen Your Celebrating Skills

Celebrating is a skill that adults with ADD (Attention Deficit... Read More

Do You Believe What You Think?

If you work toward what you dream, the dream can... Read More

The Art of Thankfulness

With Thanksgiving approaching, I thought it would be especially appropriate... Read More

Down On Your Luck? Heres How You Get Over The Hump!

It's time to put a bad rumor to rest right... Read More

Reframing Rejection

So people will reject us no matter how good we... Read More