Let me preface this by saying right up front - this is NOT for everyone. The key is that my situation was friendly enough to still communicate with each other after we split. My ex-wife and I agreed that our kids were certainly worth that! And we still have to deal with one another until they are through college. This is offered as a life experience only and not intended as legal advice. As such, this may not apply to you.
After 25 years of marriage, I decided that I did not want to be married to my wife. We had drifted apart and in the last few years, things were getting worse. We had little in common anymore... including friends. By and large, mine were different from hers. She would go away on her weekends and I would go on mine. Other than our children, whom we both love very much, we were just a couple living together. She is still a good woman, just not one I wanted to be married to. There had to be something else... Sound familiar?
As our situation unfolded, she retained an attorney early on and we began negotiations in earnest within a month of separation. Sure we had our differences! But with an open line of communication available, we (her attorney and I) talked out our problems and came to an agreement within a few months.
I felt confident in representing myself after performing a few hours of research on the internet. And you bet, I was prepared to bail out and get an attorney too. But having done the research, nothing that came up was a surprise at all. I was very pleasantly surprised and amazed. I found that many things were already prescribed by statute as being pretty cut and dried. Child support? Maintenance? In NY, where I live, it was a matter of using past incomes to arrive at an appropriate level. The method and level were already set.
When it seemed to be all sorted out, I went to an attorney that a friend recommended highly. He had an offer of the first consultation costing only $50. for a one half hour conference. All I did was take the agreement to him for review. At the consultations conclusion, his exact words were "It seems that you have a pretty good handle on this. If you can get this signed and executed, you don't need me. Just call me if anything changes." Frankly I was overwhelmed! I had just saved $3,000. minimum! Money that could be used to put MY kids through college, not his!
I don't really know how unique my situation was. Hence, I do credit some luck on my part, as I said in the article summary. But it wasn't difficult.
I have performed a few legal services for myself in the past such as setting up a corporation, partnership, and purchase agreements. I believe that a person of reasonable intelligence can save an incredible amount of money on legal services, if they will do the research and use the preprinted legal forms that so many attorneys use themselves. It helps if you have gone through similar situations in the past. But had I ever had a divorce? Heck no! I had been married for over 25 years.
But here's the catch, I don't have a degree in law either! I urge you to not take this as a slam on attorneys. They have an excellent purpose in society, in spite of the jokes. I had the comfort level that allowed me to proceed beyond what I had anticipated I could. It won't work for everyone. Certainly, not everyone has that comfort level. It worked for me.
As a result of his life experiences, the author, George R Devendorf, was able to save several thousand dollars in legal fees. As a result, Mr. Devendorf has created a website to help others that feel able to represent themselves in certain legal matters. http://www.GotLegalHelp.com offers downloadable legal forms that are the same forms used by attorneys themselves! Whether your issue is Divorce, Incorporation, Last Will & Testament, Prenuptial Agreement, or Bankruptcy, GLH forms are available for most states.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|


Surviving divorce can be a valid fear if you're contemplating... Read More
If there were no legal system, no lawyers and no... Read More
During a wedding ceremony, when people are joined together in... Read More
According to the Center for Disease Control's National Vital Statistics... Read More
When making a divorce decision, there are quite a few... Read More
Even if you believe your case will ultimately be agreed... Read More
No one besides you can determine whether or not a... Read More
Divorce is difficult at the 'best' of times. Even when... Read More
Life after divorce is something that most people who are... Read More
It is always the children that suffer the most when... Read More
It's a well known fact that in this day and... Read More
When you're faced with the possibility of divorce it's important... Read More
The EmotionsDivorce is a scary, lonely and misunderstood process for... Read More
Divorce is something no one hopes will happen to them... Read More
The most recent statistics show that about 50% of all... Read More
Stay MarriedAlong with any tough decision comes reluctance, especially when... Read More
Deciding about whether you should get a divorce or not... Read More
We have all most probably encountered it at some stage... Read More
Divorce has become part of life in the 21st century.... Read More
It can be difficult to get over a divorce and... Read More
What is the Get?The Get is the Jewish form of... Read More
As a licensed mental health professional, I work with many... Read More
Let me preface this by saying right up front -... Read More
When making a divorce decision, there are quite a few... Read More
Women who believe a divorce is a possibility or who... Read More
You want three things in your divorce attorney: expertise in... Read More
Being marriage means being fully committed to your husband as... Read More
Having a marriage problem can be agonizing especially if you're... Read More
One out of every two marriages in America is failing.American... Read More
Being in a loveless marriage is a frustrating predicament, but... Read More
The best predictor of a good divorce outcome is the... Read More
There is no magic solution to getting issues surrounding child... Read More
Knowing What To Do In DivorceKnowing what to do when... Read More


My oldest boy asked me something the other day about... Read More
My friends call me the "Divorce Poster Child".At the age... Read More
Marriage is a very solemn and serious chapter on any... Read More
After divorce, the most important thing you can do is... Read More
When we were children we believed in fairy tales and... Read More
Seven Tips to help you keep more of your money... Read More
No matter which side you are on, spousal support is... Read More
Mary and Bill recently divorced. Their divorce decree stated that... Read More
I thought I would never feel the light of life... Read More
We have all most probably encountered it at some stage... Read More
If you are reading this, then you are probably either... Read More
For the over 50% of marriages that end in divorce,... Read More
When making a divorce decision, there are quite a few... Read More
You're going to want to be working on your divorce... Read More
Divorce is difficult at the 'best' of times. Even when... Read More
Women who believe a divorce is a possibility or who... Read More
What is the Get?The Get is the Jewish form of... Read More
Here are some useful tips on joint bank accounts and... Read More
Surviving divorce can be a valid fear if you're contemplating... Read More
Deciding about whether you should get a divorce or not... Read More
It can be difficult to get over a divorce and... Read More
No one besides you can determine whether or not a... Read More
The biggest mistake that people make when getting divorced is... Read More
Let's look at how a divorce case works so you... Read More
It's a well known fact that in this day and... Read More
There are many types of divorce articles available on the... Read More
So, you've decided that you're no longer "a couple", but... Read More
One out of every two marriages in America is failing.American... Read More
Ignorance is the most common trap in the business of... Read More
Raleigh, NC-The largest divorce firm in the state, Rosen Law... Read More
Women who believe a divorce is a possibility or who... Read More
Of course you want to get your Judgment--that's the goal... Read More
Attempts to use the worldwide Web as an effective means... Read More
Divorce |