Choosing Your Divorce Method

The biggest mistake that people make when getting divorced is that they fail to plan. They simply decide to leave the relationship and then enter and ugly and expensive battle that ends up hurting everyone involved. There are some things that you could accidentally do that will make your divorce 100 time more miserable than it really has to be.

As with anything in life, you need to have a plan. The same is true for divorce. If you dont plan for what you want - chances are you won't get what you want. The first step towards having a plan is to know exactly what you want. After you know what you want you can plan to get it.

Here is an excercise: (Get our a piece of paper and a pencil. Write the answers down to the following.)

  • Decide how much money you want (realistically) our of your divorce.

  • Decide how often you would like to see the children (if you have any)

  • Determine if the divorce will be uncontested or an all out battle.

  • Determine "when" you want to be divorced.

  • Write down all the possessions that you want (realistically).

  • Write down any other 'details' that you want established in your divorce.

    Take a few minutes and try to put everything you can on this list. You will always be able to add to it later.

    Now that you have made your list, go back and reread the list. Cross off everything on the list that isn't worth fighting for, or doing hard work to get. You can save yourself a lot of hassle by knowing what not to ight for. If it really isn't worth it to you - then don't worry about it.

    Important Note: The things that you crossed off the list as things you didn't want to fight for are things that you can 'pretend to be willing to fight for'! So when you negotiate you can mention that you have to have these things. Then you can "trade" them for more important things that you really want.

    Now you have a list of everything that you want. Be sure to include intangible things like "peace of mind", and other concepts that aren't related to physical stuff. This is important because you will be using this list to get every thing you want out of your divorce.

    Now you need to take your list and figure out a time line. If you want to get divorced in 3 months, you should probably already be contacting a lawyer. This brings up another point. Choosing the wrong lawyer can absolutely devestate the entire divorce process for you. There is a way to choose the perfect lawyer but you can ask me about that later.

    It is also important that you DON'T tell your spouse that you want a divorce until you have followed the right steps to make sure all of your bases are covered. There may be some financial things that you want to take care of BEFORE you tell your spouse you want a divorce. If you just lose it and tell them you want a divorce, they won't let you change names on the mortgage, car, checking account, etc...

    So you need to plan ahead. If you can plan ahead things will go smoother. Now if you are already in the middle of a divorce, there are still things you can plan for and other ways to get everything you want also. You need access to come easy to use tricks that can help you negotiate for everything you want. This article does not cover those tactics because there are too many to list here. A key factor in your negotiating skills is making your spouse believe that they are getting a better deal than you. There are ways to do this. If you can't get them to believe they are getting a better deal, then you need to employ stronger tactics to get what you want. You will be able to use the items that you crossed off of your list as leverage in your negotiations.

    It is vitally important that you plan for divorce with the right divorce method. From the list you just made, you can make a detailed divorce method of your own to get exactly what you want from your divorce. You should also seek out special techniques that will accelerate the results of your plan. If there is a way that you can tap into the experience of thousands of people to get results, you should do so. I am not saying this to be mysterious. If you read every last word of this article you will know where to find those resources.

    Now take action and work your plan!

    Wishing You Happiness in Divorce,

    Kyle Chambers

    About The Author

    Kyle Chambers is a specialist at getting the most financially and mentally out of your divorce. Hundreds of people have already benefitted by little-known tricks in getting more money, custody rights, and just about everything else you want from your divorce. To get the most out of your divorce go to http://www.DivorceMethod.com.

    In The News:


  • pen paper and inkwell


    cat break through


    Surviving Divorce: What To Think About To Ensure Surviving Divorce

    Surviving divorce can be a valid fear if you're contemplating... Read More

    Divorce: Coping With The Family Law Process

    The EmotionsDivorce is a scary, lonely and misunderstood process for... Read More

    Guide To Reducing The Cost Of Divorce

    Seven Tips to help you keep more of your money... Read More

    Healing Dysfunctional Families

    In a recent article entitled "Some Evidence On How We... Read More

    Divorce

    The most recent statistics show that about 50% of all... Read More

    How to Recover From Divorce

    As a licensed mental health professional, I work with many... Read More

    Commitment

    Being marriage means being fully committed to your husband as... Read More

    Coping With Divorce Anger

    Successfully releasing your anger will help you begin healing after... Read More

    Steps Toward Divorce

    When you're faced with the possibility of divorce it's important... Read More

    Divorce -Is It Lawful?

    The question of divorce and its lawfulness is of long... Read More

    9 Steps to Regaining Self-Esteem After Divorce

    Divorce is difficult at the 'best' of times. Even when... Read More

    Divorce: Secrets To Coping With A Divorce Announcement

    During a wedding ceremony, when people are joined together in... Read More

    Divorce and Children: Things To Consider When Youre Staying Married Only For Your Children

    All children are different and respond differently to divorce. Depending... Read More

    Seven Sets of Documents You Need For Your Divorce

    Even if you believe your case will ultimately be agreed... Read More

    A Time of Grief and Healing After Separation and Divorce

    I thought I would never feel the light of life... Read More

    Divorce: How To Survive A Divorce And Move On With Your Life

    One out of every two marriages in America is failing.American... Read More

    5 Things To Do Before You Even Think About Getting A Divorce

    There are many steps to take to protect yourself in... Read More

    Hidden Divorce Costs

    Divorce has become part of life in the 21st century.... Read More

    Deciding On Spousal Support

    No matter which side you are on, spousal support is... Read More

    Five Christmas Survival Tips For The Divorced & Single Parent

    For the over 50% of marriages that end in divorce,... Read More

    Advantages to Doing Your Own Divorce

    There are many advantages to doing your own divorce. Three... Read More

    Deciding on Divorce: How to Know You are Making the Right Choice

    It's a well known fact that in this day and... Read More

    Dating Tips for Divorced and Widowed Moms

    Dating is tough for just about everybody, but it's even... Read More

    Stop Divorce: Should You Try To Stop Your Divorce If Youre Just Thinking About Getting A Divorce?

    Thinking about getting a divorce doesn't necessarily mean that you... Read More

    5 Ways To Ensure You Will Have a Happy Life After Divorce

    Life after divorce is something that most people who are... Read More

    Effects of Divorce on Children

    When a couple decides their marriage is over, a tremendous... Read More

    Divorce Roadmap: The Route Around the Legal System

    Let's look at how a divorce case works so you... Read More

    Tax & Financial Impacts of Divorce: 10 Mistakes to Avoid

    Divorce is something no one hopes will happen to them... Read More

    Reasons For Divorce; What Constitutes Viable Reasons For Thinking About Or Wanting A Divorce?

    According to the Center for Disease Control's National Vital Statistics... Read More

    Divorce--Negotiating Agreement: Ten Steps

    The best predictor of a good divorce outcome is the... Read More

    The Job of a Divorce Attorney

    Marriage is a very solemn and serious chapter on any... Read More

    Credit and Divorce

    Mary and Bill recently divorced. Their divorce decree stated that... Read More

    How To Identify What The Question Should I Get a Divorce? Means To You

    Deciding about whether you should get a divorce or not... Read More