Change 101: How to Handle the Changes that Come Your Way

One of the few things that are constant in this world is change. At the same time, many people just don't like change. As a matter of fact, the only person I know that always likes change is a wet baby!

Having said that, I believe that most people do not like change because they either don't know how to respond to it, or respond poorly.

One way to think about this is that change is like waves on the beach. Just like change, waves are relentless, can be very powerful, and there's really only three things you can do with a wave: let it knock you down, survive it, or ride it.

Let's take a closer look at each of these three ways to handle change.

Letting it knock you down

We let the waves of change knock us down when we take what I call the "dead roach approach" to change. That is, flat on our back, feet in the air, and just let it take control.

You can tell you are taking this approach when you say things like:

"I'm so stressed out!"
"I can't take this!"
"This isn't fair."
"Why does this always have to happen to me?"

Surviving it

Doesn't surviving change sound like a good thing to want to do? While in a few cases it's really the only thing you can do, it really isn't the optimal approach to take. I don't know about you, but merely surviving doesn't sound like a very compelling way to live to me.

If you're thinking and saying these things, you've probably settled on merely surviving:

How can I get through this?
What's the worst that could happen here?
I don't know if I can take this.
What can I do to get by?

The probably with taking a survival approach is that you just merely get by. When you're ready to do more than just get by, it's time to begin.........

Riding it

Riding the waves of change means moving from a state of survival to a state I call "thrival." Thrival is simply the process of making change work for you.

Here are some questions to ask to begin to learn how to thrive on change:

How can I make this work for me?
What's good about this?
What does this change allow me to do that I couldn't do before?
What positive things might this change force me to do that I might not have thought of doing before?
Since life has handed me a lemon, how can I make lemonade?

Change is inevitable. How we handle it is optional. Make the choice to ride the waves and you're likely to create a compelling life for yourself.

Visit SecretsofGreatRelationships.com for tips and tools for creating and growing a great relationship. You can also subscribe to our f*r*e*e 10 day e-program on how to enrich your relationship today, from relationship coach and expert Jeff Herring.

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