How To Make A Strong First Impression: Seven Tips That Really Work

We have all heard this warning: You never get a second chance to make a good first impression. Also, human behavior specialists caution that we only have from seven to seventeen seconds of interacting with strangers before they form an opinion of us.

With this widely acknowledged pressure to make our case instantly, here are my seven tips for making your first impression strongly positive.

ONE: The greatest way to make a positive first impression is to demonstrate immediately that the other person--not you--is the center of action and conversation.

Illustrate that the spotlight is on you only, and you*ll miss opportunities for friendships, jobs, promotions, love relationships, networking, and sales. Show that you are other-centered, and first-time acquaintances will be eager to see you again.

Recently I attended a conference. At lunch, my wife and I sat with several people we didn*t know. While most of our tablemates made good impressions, one man emerged as the person we*d be sure to avoid all weekend. He talked about himself, non-stop. Only rarely did anyone else get a chance to speak. Unfortunately, he probably thought he was captivating us with his life story.

I applaud this definition of a bore: Somebody who talks about himself so much that you don*t get to talk about yourself.

TWO: You*ll make a superb initial impression when you demonstrate good listening skills. Give positive verbal cues:

Hmmm. . .interesting! Tell me more, please. What did you do next?

Just as actors benefit from prompts, your conversational partner will welcome your assistance in keeping the exchange going.

Nonverbally, you show you*re a skilled listener by maintaining steady eye contact. Remember how you respond to the social gadabout who appears to be looking over your shoulder for the next person he or she wants to corner. Remember, and offer full attention to everyone you meet.

THREE: Use the name of a new acquaintance frequently. Example: Judy, I like that suggestion. Or: Your vacation must have been exciting, Fred. You show that you have paid attention from the start, catching the name during the introduction. Equally as important, you*ll make conversations more personal by including the listener*s name several times.

FOUR: Be careful with humor.

Although a quip or two might serve as an icebreaker, stay away from sarcastic remarks that could backfire. Because you don*t know a stranger*s sensitivities, prolonged joking might establish barriers you can*t overcome, either now or later.

FIVE: Give up the need to be right.

This was Dr. Wayne Dyer*s advice in his wonderful book, Real Magic. Confrontations with somebody you*ve just met will destroy rapport before you even start building it. Wait until you have established credibility before you challenge another*s statements.

SIX: Appearance counts.

Several years ago, a professional colleague offered to meet me for lunch. I decided against wearing a suit, opting for a sport coat and tie. When he showed up in shorts and sandals, the message he conveyed was: Bill, meeting you is a rather ordinary experience, and doesn*t call for me to present a business-like appearance. Not surprisingly, that was the last time I met with him.

True, standards for appropriate attire have changed drastically. Maybe the best advice I can share came from a participant in a communication seminar I conducted. She said: I don*t dress for the job I have now, I dress for the job I want to have.

SEVEN: Speak clearly, confidently, and convincingly.

As a communication specialist, I have to point out that an individual*s speaking style impacts the first impression, maybe more than we wish. Listeners judge our intelligence, our cultural level, our education, even our leadership ability by the words we select--and by how we say them.

Think of Professor Henry Higgins of My Fair Lady, who changed a so-called guttersnipe into a lady, by teaching her to speak skillfully. While none of us occupies the lowly level of Eliza Doolittle, we can keep her example in mind. Rather than mumble, speak so you*re easily heard. Enunciate clearly. Alter your pitch, to avoid the dullness of a monotone. Display animation in both voice and facial expression. Gesture naturally, without canning your movements.

Keep these seven tips in mind. They will reduce your fear of business and social encounters with unfamiliar faces. More positively, you*ll start enjoying poise and success that you thought were beyond your reach.

About The Author

Bill Lampton, Ph.D., wrote The Complete Communicator: Change Your Communication, Change Your Life! As a business consultant, speaker and coach, he helps organizations improve their communication, motivation, customer service and sales.

His Web site: http://www.ChampionshipCommunication.com

E-mail: mailto:drbill@ChampionshipCommunication.com

---

A Magnificent Obsession Is The Best Medicine!

The idea I'm about to share with you can bring... Read More

Complete Self Acceptance

One of the most important parts of Personal Mastery is... Read More

If Youre in a Hole, Stop Digging

If you find yourself in a difficult situation, don't continue... Read More

The Big Key to Freedom

When our clients are exposed to our company, they are... Read More

Follow Your Dream

If you have a dream, follow it. No matter how... Read More

Achieving Your Vision of Abundance

How can we have more abundance in our lives? It... Read More

How To Bypass Your Conscious Mind and Program Yourself For Success

Emile Coué, the French psychotherapist once said: "When the imagination... Read More

Beads?A Sign of the Times?

When you hear the word "beads," do you immediately think... Read More

How We Evolved Into An Un-Charming Culture...(And What To Do About It)

Charm did not play a very large role in that... Read More

Ending the Internal Conflict

If you read personal growth or self-help books at all,... Read More

The Art of Possibility

"Consult not your fears but your hopes and your dreams.... Read More

Change Your Story; Change Your Life

When was the last time you told someone the story... Read More

Rising Above the Average

There is nothing more motivating than reading a story about... Read More

To Be A Cut Above The Rest!

Mannerisms and personality traits go a long way in making... Read More

Motivation for Life: What Would You Do if You Could Have a Do Over?

"The only thing it takes 365 days to change is... Read More

The Law of Attraction and Love

The Law of Attraction says that 'like attracts like'. It... Read More

What You Sow You Reap!

Go into the fields and country lanes in the spring-time,... Read More

The Secret Weapon For Gaining Wealth

Recently a friend of mine was talking about all the... Read More

Your Mind is a Battlefield

Every person should enjoy life in abundance and prosperity, but... Read More

Secret of Wealth

"Before I had a lot of money, I was really... Read More

The Way of Attraction - Walking the Path

"Slowly, slowly, walk the path and you might never stumble... Read More

Communication Quiz: Are You a Great Communicator?

Communication, which occupies approximately 70% of our waking hours, is... Read More

Are You The Worlds Expert On Yourself?

Congratulations! You are the world's expert.That's right: you are the... Read More

Finding Truth

Why Must We Find Truth:Finding truth can be a very... Read More

The Powerful Mastermind Team

Your Access to AchievementA few years ago I read the... Read More

Are You a Sheep in People Clothing?

Many people, who feel that they are independent and communicate... Read More

Reminiscing About Your Past Can Stimulate Your Future

Have you ever thought much about how some of your... Read More

Universal Law Series - the Law of Cause & Effect

This is the third of seven articles in our continuing... Read More

What Did You Want To Be When You Grew Up

When I was seven years old I wanted to be... Read More

Letting Go and Trusting The Universe

One of the most important things in Wealth Creation is... Read More

The Top 10 Roadblocks to Attracting Prosperity and what We can Do About Them!

If it were easy, everyone would do IT; everyone would... Read More

Vacation Longing: What You Can Learn From It

Every person's life journey is unique. Figuring out what you... Read More

Appreciation Attracts Prosperity

Did you know that appreciation is one of the most... Read More