Lesson 69 - When Networking Events Fail

The Story

In a quest to create strategic alliances, coalitions, and partnerships, we don't usually allow ourselves to imagine our efforts failing. We don't imagine faltering at building relationships with people, since working with others comes naturally to most people.

It's even harder to imagine that people would decline to help us with our work after they've gotten to know our reputations. It is unthinkable to consider that after doing all the right things, attending the right events, having a polished image, keeping lines of communications open, and establishing proper business rapport, that business ventures set up through network could fail.

We don't typically invest our time, effort, and money in attending events that in some way are not mutually beneficial. For example, frequently benefactors donate large sums of money to their favor charity for several reasons. First, because they support the work the organization is accomplishing, and second, to increase their reputation and prominence in the business community through establishing and advancing their niche in the market place through public relations. Monetary donations also provide tax credit to the donor's organization. So given all that we do to be successful in establishing networks to make our work and events successful, how do we handle networking efforts that fail?

A while ago I began attending an organization called the "Love Corporation's" yearly fundraising event. The first year a friend invited me to accompany her. Each year after that I began attended the event on my own. By the fourth year of participating, I had pretty much gotten to know certain people and these certain people knew me. Many of the relationships I found through this event blossomed into more permanent friendships, with people whom I would communicate with on a weekly basis.

During the fourth year an incident occurred. I asked a certain NBC Washington news anchor if I could interview him for my second book. He agreed, and we had the interview on the spot. Up to that point when we saw each other we would have great conversations. So, when Barbershop Talk was released I sent him a complementary copy. With that complimentary copy, I wrote up an idea for a news story and hoped that he would include my book and me in the story.

It is difficult to admit that through this incident I realized that for four years I read our relationship wrong. He liked my story idea and subsequently aired a story using my idea and suggested topic. However, he didn't include my new book or me, and gave me no credit for the idea! I sat angrily in front of the television and watched him interview other people using my idea without getting any credit as the person to whom the idea was attributed.

My years of networking with him at this yearly event failed. It failed for one reason, because I assumed that he was honorable and would help those who helped him. I was so wrong. Another reason the relationship failed was because I didn't know his work ethic well enough before trusting him with an idea. We never can exactly know what goes on behind the scenes of a news programming business, and journalism, like other professionals, are not always straight and honest.

Maureen Dowd described the way I felt through defining the Woodard-Darman Law that, "A friendship between a reporter and source lasts only until it is profitable for one to betray the other."

The Lesson

What is the best way to handle failed networking events or situations? The best thing to do is evaluate and learn from what happened, why it happened, and how to prevent it from happening again. Though one cannot predict what will happen in every situation, predicting consequences of certain situations comes easier with age and experience. Analyzing all the factors that lead to the specific outcome you desire will allow you to be prepared when the outcomes unfolds. So in retrospect, I was betrayed but in the long run given material to reflect on through which to teach others.

Melvin Murphy is a Consummate Speaker, Noted Author & Certified Seminar Leader. His latest book is title, It's Who You Know! Creating Alliances and Partnerships through Networking. Contact him at: MMurphy833@aol.com

---

Networking

Networking: Is it who you know or what you know... Read More

Planting the Seeds of Greatness - Make it Great Newsletter #7

Thought of the WeekThis week, I'd like to challenge you... Read More

Volunteering for a Networking Group

When is it appropriate to volunteer to take a position... Read More

Five Stumbling Blocks To Successful Networking And How To Overcome Them

The ability to connect with people is essential to success... Read More

62 Ways to MAXIMIZE Your Approachability

If you walk into your local bookstore and pick up... Read More

Ask for What YOU Want and Gain More Business

Why ask others for help and what do you gain... Read More

The Answer to Your Worst Networking Nightmare

Imagine you just met your ideal client at a networking... Read More

Networking Group Loyalty Requirements

How can you find out the group loyalty requirements before... Read More

What a Leads Exchange Group can do for You

What is the definition of a leads exchange and how... Read More

Networking: Is Your Approach Too Self-Centered?

It's a classic mistake by networkers: their approach is focused... Read More

3 Reasons to Join a Group

Defining your purpose for joining a group.When you make the... Read More

How to Make the Most of Those First 30 Seconds

Did you just meet the most important person in your... Read More

How to Find Participants for a Trial Run

Why is a network meeting the best place to get... Read More

Give People Something to Talk About!

My husband and I tried an experiment one night. We... Read More

How To Make Your Next Networking Event A Success

There are people who are natural born networkers - those... Read More

Write It Down!

Why would you want to write information on paper when... Read More

Who Are You and What The Heck Do You Do?

A few years ago, I was attending a family function... Read More

Come Home Rich - How to Get the Most out of Your Next Conference

Success in your career depends upon how well you manage... Read More

How to Create an Interest Story for the Press

What makes a good interest story?An interest story is just... Read More

How to be Known

Why business relationships are formed with certain people?If you go... Read More

You Can?t Spell Networking Without Serendipity

"Fear not to entertain strangers for by so doing some... Read More

Increasing the ROI on Your Networking

Networking requires an investment of time, money and effort. Here... Read More

Lesson 69 - When Networking Events Fail

The StoryIn a quest to create strategic alliances, coalitions, and... Read More

Unforgettable First Impressions Part 2: Its All About Them!

Jean de la Bruyere said, "The great gift of conversation... Read More

Lesson 61 - When Does Aggressiveness Turn Into Annoyance?

The StoryWhen attending conferences, conventions, or private events, it's guaranteed... Read More

Real Business Networking Doesnt Happen at Networking Events

Real networking isn't about handing out business cards at a... Read More

Acknowledging Referrals! What?s in It For You?

I grew up in a household where saying thank you... Read More

Creating Successful Alliances and Partnerships through Networking

Douglas Wilder, former Governor of the Commonwealth of Virginia, and... Read More

Getting Leads

How many leads do you pass on?As a reminder, you... Read More

Unforgettable First Impressions Part 1: Discover the CPI

People like others whom they are like. So if you... Read More

You MUST Be Visible

Have you ever noticed how visible large corporations are? Take... Read More

Successfully Meeting And Greeting - Ten Strategies For Getting Off To A Good Start

A day in the life of every businessperson is made... Read More

Networking to a New Life

Research shows that talking to strangers -- not people in... Read More