If He Insists That You Work...

Once, when asked about her life, former First Lady Barbara Bush said, "I married well."

Is it wrong to want to marry well? Ladies, it's all about survival - and it's all about what you will be able to do for your children. Marry well, and you will never have to fear the basic survival issues, such as illness and unemployment - threats that single women (especially single mothers) have to face every day.

Mother always said, "You can just as easily love a rich man as a poor man." Mother was right.

But what makes a man rich? Richness comes in many forms. Another word for riches is "abundance." Life can be abundant in many ways. A relationship can be abundant in love, in trust, in affection, in fun, and in respect. Marrying your best friend is a sure way to an abundant emotional life.

What is it about wealth and abundance that make these things so appealing to so many of us? Take the time to think about this before you proceed on your journey to find a wealthy mate.

Abundance means security.

We have security when we no longer have to worry how we will get the money for our basic needs and wants.

We have security when our life is not dependent upon having and keeping a job - especially not a job we dread going to every day.

We have security when there is more than enough money to take care of us, now and in the future.

We have security when we know that our children will not have to live in impoverished neighborhoods and be exposed to bad influences.

It is not wrong to want to have money. It is not wrong to want to marry someone who handles his or her money prudently. Nor is it unusual, whether you are rich or not, to want to marry someone who is financially secure. No one wants to get romantically involved with someone with chronic problems with money - gambling, debt, overspending, risktaking. These things can ruin a marriage or relationship faster than anything.

However, there are hidden riches in marrying many men whom you might otherwise overlook. If you marry a man who gives you the freedom of choice as to whether you work or not, you have in essence just become a millionaire, even if your husband earns $30,000 per year!

"Do the math": if you marry at age 30, you may be married for 40 or more years. 40 years x $30,000 per year = $1,200,000 - money that is being earned for you while you are busy raising a family and nurturing your life together. A husband who doesn't insist that you work automatically makes you a millionaire!! You don't have to be "rich" - to be rich!!

But what is happening today? Young women report all the time that guys are bringing this subject up on the first date! Before the cappuccino is cold, these men are telling women that any wife of theirs should expect to help bring home the bacon, even after they have children!

What is a guy like this really telling you?

He is saying loud and clear that to him, marriage is like a business. If he takes on a partner, he expects to earn twice as much.

He is saying that the quality of life for his children is secondary to making sure there is extra money in his bank account.

He is saying that he wants to keep buying his "toys" more than he wants a wonderful, cozy life with his beloved wife and children!

Run, do not walk!

You are far better off remaining single than marrying a man who views marriage and family in this light. Keep searching until you find the man who truly understands the meaning of marriage and family.

These men are out there!!

Where can you find a man who wants a traditional family life, with whom you can raise beautiful children who have the best of both parents while growing up (instead of spending most of their time in school and daycare with thrown-together frozen meals and an exhausted mom and dad)?

The best place to find a man like this is in a church or synagogue.

And the best place to find churches with the most eligible men is in a larger city. However, you don't have to move. You can meet men in reputable Christian or Jewish online dating services.

Have you seen the women who work full-time at demanding jobs while at the same time raising babies, toddlers, or school-aged children?

These women are stretched to the max. They spend from morning till night working both at their jobs and then at home taking care of their families.

If you should be so blessed as to find or to already have a man in your life who genuinely wants you to have the freedom of choice to stay home and take care of your family, you must never take him for granted.

If you are fortunate enough to marry a man who encourages you to stay home after your children are born, you must do your part to make it worthwhile for him! How can you do that? There are four important ways:

No yelling - no nagging - ever. On the contrary - build up your husband in every way you can.

Stay attractive and stay in shape. The best way to do that is to keep exercising.

Keep your home neat, uncluttered, and beautiful. It doesn't have to be fancy to be beautiful. Less is more.

Never, and I mean never, get over your head in debt. If you need extra cash, find ways to make money. The old saying is true: where there is a will, there is a way!

A woman can make her own fortune with or without a man in her life. Women are doing it every day. You don't need a man, rich or not, to complete your life. But if you decide it's time to fall in love, be sure to make a wise decision in the area of money, and marry someone who is responsible with his earnings, and who is generous. (The most unsexy man in the world is the cheapskate.) You don't need to deal with someone else's debt collectors calling your home and a ruined credit report as a result of your wedding vows. You don't need to be the only one who pays the bills while your man plays computer games, entertains buddies, and drinks beer all day.

Smart, responsible attitudes about money will result in long-term wealth and security at any income level. Marriage can be difficult under even the best of circumstances. Marry a man who adds to your life, rather than takes away from it, and then make him glad he married you. Then you have indeed married rich!

Sarah Tanner is a writer about relationships and charm. Visit her website, http://www.howtohavecharm.com, and sign up there for her unique emails about charm and relationships. You will receive free ebooks on relationships and self-improvement with each email! You are welcome to reprint this article if you include this resource box with all links unchanged.

---

Girl Talk - Boy Talk

Chas and Dave wrote a song about it and how... Read More

Relationship Advice: Why Brad and Jen Broke Up and What We Can Learn from Them

It's been a few months since the riveting headlines: The... Read More

Relationship Tips: 16 Practical Dramatic Ways to Know if He/She is REALLY Changing

Every relationship hits a snag, or worse, a major crisis... Read More

Are Men and Women Really from Different Planets?

Are men really from Mars, and women from Venus?'what women... Read More

Has The Magic Gone From Your Relationship?

Kathleen and Dan have been together for several years now.... Read More

Great Relationship Advice: Dont Be a Darren Stevens

Q: I can't believe I'm asking this question, because I... Read More

How To Support Friends and Loved Ones Through an Abusive Relationship

This is a question that comes up a lot. It's... Read More

Loving Without Losing Yourself!

You are in love and it feels wonderful. This love... Read More

Stop, Look, & Listen: The 3-Step Approach to Understanding Your Partner

IntroductionDo you feel misunderstood by your partner? Seem to keep... Read More

Attention Guys: Impress Your Girls - Send Flowers!

Remember that big hug she gave you when you got... Read More

10 Clues of an Online Affair

1. Your spouse or partner spends excess time on-line. Who... Read More

Lingerie Buying Advice For Guys

Buying lingerie for your lover can be one of the... Read More

Romancing The Senses

Romance can be experienced in numerous ways, but it is... Read More

To Cheat or Not To Cheat

You know I am getting fed up with people who... Read More

Global Conflict and Inter-Religious Dialogue: The Importance of Understanding Others

As is learned in the study of Comparative Religion, the... Read More

How Can Empathy Shape Your Values?

One of the most underrated concepts that most people overlook... Read More

Noon (A Love Story)

Noon (A Short Love story, dedicated to my wife Rosa)Marina,... Read More

Great Relationship Advice: How to Balance Your Hear at Work with Your Heart at Home

Remember the Tom Cruise movie "Jerry Maguire?"From my seat in... Read More

Society?s Misconception of Soul Mates - Divine Source through Barbara Rose

Society's current conception of the term "soul mate" is completely... Read More

Love Advice: Are You Frozen in Time?

Falling in love is a process that one cannot stay... Read More

Finding Your Feng Shui Power Spots for Love and Romance

The first step in using feng shui to attract a... Read More

Relationship Advice: Starter Marriages

A man walking through the woods near a river hears... Read More

The Evolution of Dating at 40 and 50

I am sick of the dating scene at 40. The... Read More

How Not to Compromise With Your Partner

Do you ever disagree with your spouse? Or your boyfriend... Read More

Sad Scientific Facts About Love

Disaster results when we see women trying to change a... Read More

Swinging! Will My Spouse Be Interested?

How does one talk his/her spouse into living the Swinging... Read More

7 Power Skills that Build Strong Relationships

A strong, healthy relationship is one in which the partners... Read More

The Sound of His Laughter

When you're searching for your Mr. Right, I want you... Read More

Relationship Problems Have Warning Signs

Families are made up of individuals; men, women, and children.... Read More

Great Relationships: How to Create a Nag-Free Zone

Q: My wife and I have a good marriage that... Read More

Great Relationships: 3 Really Dumb Mistakes and 3 Smarter Moves to Make

1) Think short term.Many people enter marriage with the same... Read More

9 Reasons You May Not be Getting the Love you Deserve

Are you getting the love you deserve? Are you being... Read More

Breaking Your Relationship Pattern, Part 2

The first step toward being able to attract and create... Read More