Motivation - How to Design a Life

"Have you ever felt like you've become the worst possible version of yourself?" - Tom Hanks in "You've Got Mail"

Have you ever been relaxing at the movies, enjoying a nice lite movie, only to get blown away by a line said in passing?

That's what happened recently as my wife and I watched "You've Got Mail" with Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan. The couple are having an ongoing email courtship, exchanging messages in the wee hours of the night, when this question comes out of nowhere: "have you ever felt like you've become the worst possible version of yourself?"

And I thought we were just going to the movies.

I think the question is so striking because most of us have felt that way at some point in our lives. I know I have, and so have lots of the folks that tell me their stories every day.

Here's a story emailed to me (thanks Aunt Jan) that does a nice job of setting the stage for designing the kind of life you want:

"An elderly carpenter was ready to retire. He told his employer of his plans to leave the house building business and live a more leisurely life with his wife enjoying his extended family.

The contractor was sorry to see his good worker go and asked if he could build just one more house as a personal favor. The carpenter said yes, but in time it was easy to see that his heart was not in his work. He resorted to shoddy workmanship and inferior materials. It was an unfortunate way to end his career.

When the carpenter finished his work and the builder came to inspect the house, the contractor handed the front-door key to the carpenter.

"This is your house," he said, "my gift to you."

What a shock! What a shame! If he had only known he was building his own house, he would have done it all so differently. Now he had to live in the home he had built none too well.

So it is with us. We build our lives in a distracted way, reacting rather than acting, willing to put up less than the best. At important points we do not give the job our best effort. Then with a shock we look at the situation we have created and find that we are now living in the house we have built. If we had realized, we would have done it differently.

Think of yourself as the carpenter. Think about your house. Each day you hammer a nail, place a board, or erect a wall. Build wisely. It's the only life you will ever build. Even if you live it for only one day more, that day deserves to be lived graciously and with dignity. The plaque on the wall says, "Life is a do-it-yourself project."

Your life today is the result of your attitudes and choices in the past. Your life tomorrow will be the result of your attitudes and the choices you make today." ? Author Unknown.

I'll close with these two questions:

1 - Are you happy with the results of the attitudes/choices/decisions you've made that got you here?

2 - What do you need to do, beginning today, that will support you in being happy with the attitudes/choices/decisions you've made 3 months from now? six months? a year? 5 years? 10 years? and the rest of your life?

Visit SecretsofGreatRelationships.com for tips and tools for creating and growing a great relationship. You can also subscribe to our f*r*e*e 10 day e-program on how to enrich your relationship today, from relationship coach and expert Jeff Herring.

---

Resolution Revolution: 3 Tips For Creating Real Change in the New Year

'Tis the season once again for parties, champagne, noisemakers...and of... Read More

Your Growing Edge

You've probably heard the term "leading edge" used to refer... Read More

Courage

"Courage is being scared to death - but saddling up... Read More

Self-Esteem: You Matter

You'd be surprised. Maybe amazed. If you could see the... Read More

7 Reasons To Stop Procrastinating Today

Procrastination is a delay tactic that has the ability to... Read More

People Who Get What They Want: What Are They Thinking?

Imagine being able to choose any outcome and automatically feel... Read More

Courage Is A Gift

"It is not what happens to you, but how you... Read More

7 Tips For Lasting Motivation And Greater Success

Lasting motivation is possible once you adopt an outlook that... Read More

Storytelling - The Great Motivator of People

In a data-driven world, facts and figures are the order... Read More

Every Passing Minute Is A Chance To Turn It All Around

Every passing minute.When I first heard this line, in the... Read More

Develop Guts to Achieve Glory

It is just amazing the amount of people who don't... Read More

Prime That Pump! Part 2

In Part 1 of this article, we talked about reaching... Read More

4 Qualities of Highly Successful People

What if you can be, do or have anything you... Read More

12 Reflections on Personal Responsibility

Responsibility means being accountable for what we think, say, and... Read More

Thinking for Success - The Same Method Does Not Work For Everyone

I am always concerned that there are so many books... Read More

Have You Ever Not Done Something Because Someone Said You Couldnt?

"Every truly great accomplishment is at first impossible." It's a... Read More

Procrastination

Allow me to start this with a quote:To think too... Read More

Stop Procrastination--Just Do It!

In this article I'll talk about the reason that stops... Read More

About Creating a New Life

1. Where do I start to create a new life?There... Read More

The Power

I had a friend ask me a question not to... Read More

Taking Action NOW: 9 Key Strategies...Part I

Awareness, understanding what impacts you!Awareness makes it possible for you... Read More

4 Simple Ways To Get Over Your Need For Acceptance... And Get On With Your Life

Imagine what your life would be like if you could... Read More

What is your Altitude?

It is something that everyone ? and I do mean... Read More

Testy Horses and the Art of Speed Waiting

"What are you waiting for?" said Nelson, looking at me... Read More

Struggling With Juggling

'The trick to juggling is determining which balls are made... Read More

Motivation and Change: Creating Your Daily Success Program

I get some of my best ideas for my column... Read More

Get Out of Your Comfort Zone - Before Its Too Late

Think about what you're doing each day and ask yourself... Read More

What Motivates the Motivator?

Someone wrote me an email a couple of weeks ago... Read More

How to Stay Motivated Until You Get What You Want

And somehow you knew how to stay motivated...Goals are mysterious... Read More

Be Action-Oriented

Are you a melancholic online business owner by nature? I... Read More

Right Action & Right Effort: The Keys to Martial Arts Mastery, Keys 3 &4

In the philosophical teachings that form the base for our... Read More

Ready, Set, Action!

James 2: 17?faith by itself, if it is not accompanied... Read More

The 31 Absolute Best Resources for Self Improvement

Every week, I hear from people with the same Self... Read More