True story: A few years back I was working with a client who had recently moved to Los Angeles. She was single, did not know many people in the big city, and felt a little lonely. I innocently suggested she give online dating a shot. It seemed like an easy and pressure-free way to meet people, and I had other clients who enjoyed their experience and were in good relationships as a result.
"What kind of desperate person do you think I am?!?" she snapped.
She apologized, but explained that she felt "weird" about online dating. This perked my curiosity, so later I asked some of my other clients if they ever tried it. Some only confessed after their faces turned three shades of crimson. Since I am a strong proponent of online dating, I dispel any stigma or embarrassment when I recommend it to my clients. This is what I tell them:
For many singles, life moves like Richard Petty around the Talladega Speedway. We change jobs every few years. We relocate more frequently. We cannot remember the last time we answered a phone with a cord. Even if time is not the issue, some single people cannot shake the feeling that everyone else is happy while they are always alone. We may look at online dating as an act of desperation, because "normal people don't need something like that."
The simple fact is that you are not weird if you use an online dating service. We only feel weird when we think we are doing something outside the norm. Consider this: over 40 million people in the US access online dating websites every month. It is the fastest growing sector of online content. There is no reason to feel embarrassed, because if you date online you are actually part of a huge group.
There is nothing wrong with wanting to find someone special, or at the very least make some new friends, so why not use every resource available to you? You do not get extra points for meeting someone in a bar or while waiting for dry socks at the Laundromat. Does it matter to you how you met the important people already in your life? You probably barely even think about it.
By setting up a personal profile and a list of likes and dislikes, you invest time in yourself. More importantly, you are taking action by trying to improve yourself and your situation. You are putting yourself out there and taking control by refusing to be lonely and isolated.
I have found many advantages to the Internet. The anonymity of online dating allows you to roll out of bed, hair standing in ten different directions, breath smelling like Boston Harbor at low tide ? then click! You stumble on a person you will be dating in a few weeks. The cost compared to going out and searching is next to nothing. You can learn more about a person's interests to see if they mesh with yours. You do not have to deal with the harshness of rejection in person. You have a huge pool of people to explore (remember, 40 million!) from all walks-of-life, people you would never have the chance to meet within your neighborhood or small circle of friends.
There is also fraud and deception. You will probably come across a photo that looks eerily like Pamela Anderson ? right down to the copyright in the lower corner. Clients tell me about married people posing as single. Nevertheless, these issues of honesty exist both on and off-line, so do not let that stop you from finding the partner you want.
With 43% of the U.S. population being single and with so many single clients asking me about Internet dating, I began to put a guide together to help my clients use this service effectively and safely and avoid these pitfalls. I want everyone to find the happiness they deserve and want to make this Tool book available to everyone for Free! To get your free E-Book, "Tools To Internet Dating" go to TheRelationshipTools.com and get your copy today.
Don't be ashamed or afraid, learn the best and safest way to use the Internet to take control of your life and find the person you deserve!
About The Author
Devlyn Steele ("America's Leading Life-Coach") has been a public consultant and a private counselor for over 15 years. A Cognitive Therapist, Radio host and Columnist, Devlyn also developed ToolsToLife.com. Devlyn maintains a thriving practice in Hollywood, where he counsels famous actors, musicians and captains of industry. Soon his new book will be available, Relationship Tools. You can hear Coach Steele live every Tuesday on LoveBeat Radio 1310 KXAM.com 7-9 PM. Arizona Time
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|


Do you strike out with single women in the romance... Read More
It's one of the supreme tragedies in life. When there's... Read More
A recent sexual assault on our campus was a wake-up... Read More
Very few singles have ever gone through life without having... Read More
If you're wondering what it means by dating service and... Read More
So you are thinking of giving online dating a try... Read More
I run a blog where I discuss the topic of... Read More
Remember Jerry Hall, the model who married Mick Jagger? Jerry... Read More
Until Death Do You Part?That certainly was a lie. Your... Read More
Dating, there are many thoughts that word brings about. Many... Read More
How many times have you heard someone say it was... Read More
How often do you find yourself wishing you could find... Read More
If you're worried and upset about your physical flaws, which... Read More
Dating online can be great fun, stimulating and exciting. So... Read More
Let me mention a few names and you can tell... Read More
In today's society, the world really is getting smaller. As... Read More
I get a lot of "reader comments" on the issues... Read More
In order to attract the man of your dreams, it... Read More
There are so many dating sites out there, hundreds if... Read More
I'm writing this for women and for men. I have... Read More
So, you've decided to take the plunge and follow in... Read More
Well, I have decided to move forward once again. I... Read More
Have you ever been talking to someone you are interested... Read More
Carly's quest in finding a suitable partner for marriage seemed... Read More
Step #1- The first impression. Before you approach a girl... Read More
So you have scored the date, she has agreed to... Read More
In my attempts to find the love of my life,... Read More
A friend of mine recently exclaimed, "Dating is so complicated!"... Read More
True story: A few years back I was working with... Read More
You should show a tolerant and open-minded attitude towards many... Read More
Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher. Madonna and Guy Ritchie. Your... Read More
Just when businesses and advertisers think they have women all... Read More
No doubt about it, Internet dating has become a unique... Read More


Overwhelmed with family, school, work and volunteer obligations, woman are... Read More
Sweet flowers alone can say what passion fears revealing Thomas... Read More
Online dating has become increasingly popular over the past several... Read More
If you are knee deep in trying to find a... Read More
Okay, you've scored a date with a sexy somebody for... Read More
Dating at an older age is not too hard. And... Read More
LadiesYes, we all have a friend who is or has... Read More
For a while now I've been wondering why some women... Read More
Hello Lucia,I regularly compliment women and tell them that I... Read More
Dating is the first step to love. I am going... Read More
We are all too familiar with the term "body language".... Read More
You should show a tolerant and open-minded attitude towards many... Read More
A few months ago I became single again after a... Read More
The number one mistake made by men on the first... Read More
Three years ago, I met my boyfriend Andy through the... Read More
I call it "The Funnel." And it's the best way... Read More
Have you been only dating people from your own ethnic... Read More
Got a case of the blind date? Oh yes we... Read More
Carly's quest in finding a suitable partner for marriage seemed... Read More
People are talking about adult personals. There's no doubt about... Read More
Define dating again as The Joy Of Dating Again. It... Read More
Has dating unknowingly become just a habit to you? Becoming... Read More
How often do girls on the street smile to you,... Read More
Did you know that Match.com has around twelve million members,... Read More
Free dating online-you've heard about it, you've read about it,... Read More
Christian singles are plentiful no matter what age you are... Read More
In as much as they want to preserve the moral... Read More
No doubt about it, Internet dating has become a unique... Read More
I don't know if the craze of SMS has caught... Read More
Deal Breakers. Everyone's got them. You know: the instant turn-offs... Read More
If you're worried and upset about your physical flaws, which... Read More
Dear Soulmate,Where are you?? It seems as if I have... Read More
So the big night is quickly approaching, your first big... Read More
Dating |