Why Bachelors Make Bad Decisions: Five Tips to Move from Reality Television to Your Career Change

The Bachelor is one of the many reality shows that have gripped the US television viewing audience.

Premise: A very eligible Bachelor (last season featured an NFL quarterback) stays in a mansion with several eligible young women. They seem to spend their days swimming, tanning, and speculating about the Bachelor's intentions. They meet the Bachelor in one-to-one and group activities. Each week the Bachelor gives a rose to the women who will continue to compete, and two who do not receive a rose go home. (If you're a more faithful viewer than I am, please email me with corrections!)

So what can we learn about career reality from this reality show?

1. Walk out the front door of your comfort zone.

From the women's perspective, The Bachelor is a metaphor for the wrong kind of job hunting. Whenever you're one of a group chasing the same dream, it's difficult to create a realistic game plan and use energy efficiently. But they're chosen to compete and it's so easy to get caught up in the game.

Career changers, of course, aren't stuck in a mansion with a single prize, however dazzling. Like the contestants, though, they can get awfully comfortable. Better to walk out the front door and keep looking until you recognize your true goal and the ink is dry on the offer letter.

2. Prepare for irrational rejection.

If you choose to stay and compete, remember that the decision-maker is looking for reasons to eliminate options because there are just too many choices to evaluate rationally. Interviewers overwhelmed by hundreds of resumes often can find an adequate choice from the first fifty ­ or from any fifty chosen at random. You can't read anything into rejection except the laws of probability and randomness.

3. Look through the windows: there's a world outside!

When you're caught up in an intense contest, it's easy to forget there's more than one race in the world and certainly more than one prize. And I believe everyone should pursue multiple goals at the same time. It sounds time-consuming, but usually you can achieve synergies by creative planning. You learn how to pursue one goal by striving after another. And most important, you're likely to come out a winner.

4. Recognize that choices look different when you're on deadline.

From the Bachelor's perspective, there are pluses and minuses to this series of forced decisions. First, it's easy to procrastinate when you face a tough decision. A deadline often clarifies options and actually makes the choice easier. But when you're facing a complex decision with consequences that last for years, where a mistake can be costly, it's best to take more time.

5. Don't anticipate the final decision until the ink is dry on the contract.

Nothing happens until you get the offer in writing. In one episode, the Bachelor took two different finalists to the same jewelry store to look at engagement rings! Even after you've looked at rings together, the show seems to say, you're not even engaged to be engaged. (We won't go into the ethical dimensions of these actions in the context of romance. But would you want to accept a rose ­ or a ring ­ from someone who just went through the same process with a different potential partner?)

I've heard first-hand accounts of verbal offers that were withdrawn or materially changed by the time they were translated to writing. And even written offers can be withdrawn for sufficient reason. During times of stress, people make promises they don't intend to keep, and others hear promises that were never intended to go beyond light banter.

Bottom Line: It's no accident that Bachelor match-ups seem to fall apart when the season ends. And it's no accident that great decisions lead to empowering, satisfying, meaningful lives.

I offer one-to-one consultations on career and business strategy.

About The Author

Cathy Goodwin, Ph.D., is an author, speaker and career/business consultant, helping midlife professionals take their First step to a Second Career. http://www.cathygoodwin.com.

"Ten secrets of mastering a major life change" mailto:subscribe@cathygoodwin.com

Contact: cathy@cathygoodwin.com 505-534-4294

---

Change Your Career, Change Your Life!

Lots of times I see and talk to people who... Read More

4 Tips for Making Successful Job Offers

The interviews are completed, the paperwork is all filled out... Read More

Evaluating Job Offers -- Eleven Warning Signs You Must Watch Out For

Moving into a new job always involves some degree of... Read More

Becoming A Home Inspector: What the Home Inspection Schools Dont Want You To Know

Chances are if you're reading this you've thought about becoming... Read More

How To Write A Job Winning Resume That Puts Yours On Top

Many people would love to get a better job. And... Read More

The Organized Job Search

Many people, under financial or other pressures to find work... Read More

Why You Need To Be An Intrapreneur

When a client asks me if I think he or... Read More

Minding Your Own Business

Think you have gone as far as you can in... Read More

Get Beyond Your Tasks

Ever hear the story of the two masons working side... Read More

Finding a Career in Harmony with Your Life Path

Which of the following would you chose? Doing your lifework... Read More

Unemployment Blues: Staying Afloat

The unemployment checks are running out and there is no... Read More

Job Search - Understand Employers

Think like an employerTo be successful in your job search... Read More

How To REALLY Look For A Job

Are you looking for a job -- really looking? Or... Read More

How to Create a Great Electronic Resume

After creating the perfect resume, you then need to distribute... Read More

Job or no Job: The Certainty of Uncertainty

Headline from AP via Yahoo News! January 11, 2005: "Chrysler... Read More

Change Your Life, Change Your Career And Get A New Job!

Careers dictate resume formatDifferent careers use different forms of resumes.... Read More

Dont Settle

Chuck was the best of the twenty-four candidates. Still, he... Read More

Seeking Knowledge Will Give You Power

What are you interested in? We all have a passion... Read More

Day Trading ? The Ultimate Work-From-Home Job?

Ever dreamt of giving up the daily grind? Want to... Read More

10 Steps to Getting the Most Out of Job Fairs

Many job seekers tend to overlook job fairs. They can... Read More

Tips for Requesting a Raise

You probably think you deserve a raise. But does your... Read More

Job Interviews -- What Your Pre-Interview Research Should Cover

When you go in for a job interview, you're not... Read More

Dissatisfied With Your job? Stop Trying To Go It Alone!

Being dissatisfied with your job is a cycle, a very... Read More

5 Interviewing Tips To Get That Job!

Anyone who is a jobseeker knows that looking for a... Read More

Career Success: Take Charge of Your Career

People react very differently to the waves of change that... Read More

Assess Your Transferable Skills

One of the most important parts of a job... Read More

Job Interview Mistakes To Avoid

By avoiding these 8 simple mistakes, you can improve your... Read More

How NOT to Write a Resume

You can learn a lot about how to do something... Read More

How I Joined the Outsourcing Revolution

Mention "outsourcing" to a programmer and you may as well... Read More

Waiting For the Official Job Offer

At the end of the third job interview, Helene was... Read More

Medical Billing Businesses Are Growing Fast And Providing A Needed Service For Doctors

You've seen the commercials and web sites about starting medical... Read More

Build New Habits -- Payday Will Come --

Feeling that it never works is not a good excuse.... Read More

Telephone Job Interview Preparation Tips

TELEPHONE INTERVIEW BACKGROUNDTelephone interviews are quite common in today's job... Read More