Living in LOVE : Remembering Why You Married

The kids are yelling, the dog is barking, and you just found out that your spouse forgot to do the one thing that you needed them to do today?again! This scenario may sound typical for your family, or your scenario could be worse. Maybe you and your spouse are arguing more and more, and connecting less and less? You may have even asked yourself, "Is this marriage a mistake?". Though you knew your life wouldn't be like the Brady Bunch, you may find yourself surprised at just how much work a marriage can be ? and its twice as hard if only one person is working at it.

If this is your situation, ask yourself why you married your spouse? I know it sounds silly, but really?why did you marry them? "Because we were in love"- well, that's the easy answer-go deeper. See, life happens?kids are born, cars breakdown, jobs are lost, and through all of the ups and downs that are inevitable, its important that you remember why you married this person.

Reflect:

  • Think of the first time you saw your spouse. What is one thing that stood out to you about them?

  • Remember one time when you were sad, angry or disappointed and your spouse really came through for you. What happened? How did it make you feel?

  • What is one thing funny thing you know about your spouse that no one else knows?

  • Think back to your single life, before you met your spouse. What was it like? Now, really think ? what is one small thing your spouse does to make you happy that you are here and not back there?

  • Remember a time when your spouse did something out of the ordinary and surprised you. What did that moment feel like?

  • Remember the first time you saw your spouse holding your child. How did that make you feel?

    Remind:

  • In a quiet time when both you and your spouse are sitting together, bring up your first date. Bring up your happiest memories of this day.

  • Think of a funny story about when you first were married ? good choices are dinners gone bad, ruined laundry, etc.

  • Talk about when you first became parents. What were your fears and hopes. Mention something positive about their parenting, and their connecting to your children.

    Renew

  • If you eat dinner infront of the TV, stop. Gather together at the table with the TV's off, so you can actually connect to your family rather than 'veg out'.

  • Be nice. Okay, sometimes that's easier said than done, but a little sweetness can go a long way. When you get up or go to another room, ask, "Can I get you anything?"

  • Be forgetful. Don't remember every little thing your spouse has done that irritates you. Sometimes we hold on to the past because it feels familiar. Its not fair to hold the past against your spouse, and its not fair for them to do it to you. If they do, lead by example. Once they see you letting go of the past, they will also. As long as they know you are holding on to the past for future fight ammunition, they will do the same.

  • Touch. Place your hand on your spouse's hand; lay your arm across their shoulders. An innocent touch can be just the softness and connection that your spouse is looking for.

  • Overlook. There is nothing gained by pointing out all of your spouse's short comings, and when they have made a mistake don't use it as an opportunity to put them down. Surprise them by 'not noticing' their mistake. No one likes to have their mistakes pointed out to them. We are all adults, and its likely that they are already aware of what they've done.

    The point is, take some time to remember why you are in this marriage, take some self control and control your end of the marriage, and take the gloves off. Your spouse is not your enemy, and remember though children are the products of marriage, they are not the glue that holds a marriage together?love is.

    Living in love with your spouse can sometimes be challenging, and that's okay- that's why the vows read for better, or for worse. With a little bit of effort on your part, and a partner that really loves you it is absolutely possible to live in love, and that is not only a great gift to yourself and your spouse. Living in love is a wonderful gift to your children.

    About The Author

    Samantha Olea is a designer, business woman, wife, and most of all Mother of 2! Samantha founded a free parenting resource at http://TheBestMoms.com hoping to help every mom be the very best mom they can be! Samantha is also the owner of her own web design, graphic design, and hosting firm at : http://getwrappedup.com and AWU Gifts: http://Gifts.GetWrappedUp.com, where she helps Moms start their own business and work from their homes.

    sam@thebestmoms.com

    In The News:

    • pen paper and inkwell


    cat break through


    Free Wedding Planning Guide and Checklist

    With so much to do, every bride needs a surefire... Read More

    Catering to Your Wedding

    Wedding catering has always been one of the most crucial... Read More

    Marriage Counseling: What Do Husbands Really Want in a Wife?

    Because many men do not discuss feelings as easily as... Read More

    Wedding Rings - How to Choose a Perfect Ring

    Selecting a wedding ring isn't as easy as it looks.... Read More

    Bridal Budget Beware

    Getting hitched, taking the plunge, tying the knot, jumping the... Read More

    Cheating Wives - Play with Your Lives!

    Many wives cheat on their husbands. This could be due... Read More

    Wedding Rings ? Through the Ages and for All Eternity

    The exact origin of the wedding ring is uncertain and... Read More

    Cheap Wedding Invitations

    Every couple has different priorities when it comes to budgeting... Read More

    Marriage Tips: Fifteen Ways to Say ?I Love You? in 3 Minutes or Less

    To keep romance alive and nurture the intimacy in your... Read More

    Wedding Gifts for Second Marriages

    Second marriages can be a tricky situation for a variety... Read More

    Get Fantastic Deals on Catering for Your Wedding

    When it comes to your catering services for your wedding,... Read More

    Men?s Moissanite Wedding Rings To Beat Other Gifts Any Day

    Whoever said diamonds are women's best friends, surely missed on... Read More

    Trust in Marriage

    Trust is the basis of all human relationships. Trust can... Read More

    The Wide Range of Maui Wedding Ceremonies

    Whatever your religious affiliation, or whatever you'd like to experience,... Read More

    Get Organized for Wedding Planning!

    You've had friends to your home for dinner. Maybe you've... Read More

    Help is Here for Your Wedding Ceremony

    When it comes to your wedding services, nobody wants to... Read More

    The Charm of Homemade Wedding Favors

    Homemade wedding favors come from a centuries old tradition of... Read More

    Choosing a Maui Wedding Package

    Just like anywhere else in America, there are a variety... Read More

    Save the Date Etiquette: Everything You Need To Know

    Save the Date Cards are announcements that inform your guests... Read More

    Family Law

    A frustrating lack of permanence plagues modern relationships. Approximately one... Read More

    Butterfly Releases

    Butterfly Releases offer the viewer the chance to see beauty... Read More

    Replacing Your Lost Wedding Ring

    Imagine it's Halloween evening and you've just gone to the... Read More

    The Monogram Theme Wedding

    Monograms are a huge trend in weddings, to the point... Read More

    Bridal Hair Stylist Goes Above and Beyond the Call of Duty

    You are locked in your seat on the most famous... Read More

    Spotlight on the Asian-Themed Wedding

    Asian-themed weddings are on the rise, and at first this... Read More

    Ten Beliefs That Can Contribute to an Unhappy Marriage

    Have you ever wondered why your marriage isn't happier? If... Read More

    Hot Wedding Trend: Platinum Wedding Rings

    In our hungry-for-anything new pop culture world, celebrities are often... Read More

    A Promise Ring- More Than Just a Pre-Engagement Ring

    When one thinks of a promise ring it is common... Read More

    Terrific Advice Concerning Destination Weddings As Shared By Two Gurus On The Topic

    Today Norm Goldman, Editor of Sketchandtravel.com & Bookpleasures.com is pleased... Read More

    Focus On What Is Important ? Your Wedding Disc Jockey Choice

    Your true love got down on his knees and asked... Read More

    Advice on Wedding Invitation Wording

    After choosing the design for your wedding invitations you can... Read More

    Who Wants to Be Rich?

    Well you may not become a billionaire or even a... Read More

    Affordable Centerpieces for Your Wedding Reception

    When it comes to decorating your reception tables, the centerpieces... Read More