Holiday Expectations

As the holidays approach, I find myself wondering how I'm going to accomplish all I expect of myself. I expect to have perfect presents under the tree for an astounding number of people who will be visiting from out of town, besides the usual round of gifts for my children, immediate family, close friends and significant others, such as teachers, school staff, hair dressers, manicurist, etc. Added to the gift buying frenzy are countless trips to the grocery and food specialty stores for the feasts I expect to prepare, again for countless people I am expected to entertain during these holidays.

What's one person to do when it becomes overwhelming and seems there's never going to be enough time, resources or energy to cope? Well, I'm not sure I have the answer. What I'm longing to do is escape to an undisclosed location (me and Dick Cheney) to save my sanity, health and well-being. Naturally, this isn't an option ? I hold the holidays too dear and my daughters have come to expect huge fanfare on these special days. I have set up their expectations of me, just as I have set up the expectations of myself that I might not be able to pull off this year due to an unstable health condition and subsequent lack of mobility I've taken for granted in years past. Mostly, I just want to be able to get it all done, as I have every other year, which is no longer an option. I am left to ponder my upcoming fate with the dread of not performing or of falling short.

I suspect the "expectations" will somehow be met, only because I couldn't bear to let my children down during the most important season for meeting expectations. And I have set myself up for all of this, gladly, willingly, never expecting "ill health" to interfere with our rituals and festivities. Never mind that this health condition was caused primarily by trying to cram five weeks worth of expectations into a ten day period when I over-booked myself with work, volunteering at my children's schools at the same time I was expected to take care of many other obligations and promises to family and friends. I think the lesson here is to relinquish the expectations of myself and scale down to a more manageable holiday routine, like it or not.

Alas, there will come a time when we parents are no longer able to perform the myriad duties and routines we've created for our families, for any number of reasons, and we will need to give up control of making sure everyone's holiday expectations are met. This could come in the form of a health crisis, monetary crisis, time-crunch crisis ? take your pick. This is the time to delegate the responsibility of the be-all, do-all parent and shift our focus to relishing time with family and friends more so than relishing the accomplishments of others and our own expectations of us.

We are in the midst of a joyous and sacred time of year when our hearts and minds should be filled with love and good will, not with a frenzy of get-it-done anxiety.

I wish you all a joyful, relaxed holiday season, filled with love and happiness. Give yourselves a break and allow one or more of the details to slip by or delegate if need be. Being there for your family in sound mind, body and spirit is ultimately more important.

I have found that doing my Christmas shopping online is a lifesaver and any other task I can accomplish online is equally gratifying. Find ways to make your life a little easier during the busy days ahead.

Copyright ? 2004-2005 - Rexanne Mancini

Rexanne Mancini is the mother of two daughters, Justice and Liberty. She is a novelist, freelance writer and maintains an extensive yet informal parenting and family web site, Rexanne.com ? http://www.rexanne.com -Visit her site for good advice, award-winning Internet holiday pages and some humor to help you cope. Subscribe to her free newsletter, Rexanne's Web Review, for a monthly dose of Rexanne: http://www.rexanne.com/rwr-archives.html

---

Great Games for Your Halloween Party

If you're having a Halloween party you need to play... Read More

30th Birthday Gift Ideas

Choosing a birthday gift for a friend about to turn... Read More

Making Time to Write this Holiday Season

As the countdown to Christmas day continues, most everyone is... Read More

12 Things That Make Life Worthwhile!

Happy New Year! Around the world, this is a time... Read More

Dress To Impress! Find Your Sexy Halloween Costume And Shake What Your Mamma Gave You

Everyone loves to look and feel good, right? Well, why... Read More

Secrets to a Stress Free Holiday

December and all the excitement that comes with it can... Read More

Marching Towards Mothers Day

"Mother: the most beautiful word on the lips of mankind."... Read More

How to Make a Gift Basket

Gift Baskets are an ideal gift for nearly any occasion.... Read More

Outdoor Halloween Decorations

Few things are more thrilling for a trick-or-treater than walking... Read More

Buying Jewelry for Mother?s Day or How To Buy The Perfect Gift for Mom Without Getting Ripped Off

Jewelry can be the perfect gift for mom on Mother's... Read More

Stress-Free Party Planning

It's a fact; most of us feel immediately stressed and... Read More

Terrible at choosing gifts?

Need help with gifts? Not everyone is good at choosing... Read More

The Fathers Day Celebration

Fathers Day is another reason to celebrate another responsible adult... Read More

Tips to Save Time & Money; Christmas Shopping Online

So Christmas is a few months away. Seems like a... Read More

Halloween Safety Tips

Halloween is an exciting night for children and a busy... Read More

Holiday Gift Ideas For Antique Lovers

1. Knowledge is Power. Whatever the area of collecting ?... Read More

Funny Couples Costume Ideas For Halloween

Tired of the same old typical Halloween costumes. You know... Read More

Mothers Day is coming-Dont Blow It!

Mother's Day is May 8th. And, you do realize all... Read More

Throwing an Anniversary Party to be Remembered

Anniversary parties are a wonderful way to celebrate two people... Read More

Giving Thanks

Can you believe that Thanksgiving is only a few weeks... Read More

Contact Lenses for Halloween

It is never too soon to begin planning the perfect... Read More

Preparing For the Holidays: Ho Ho Ho... or Bah Humbug!

Some of my clients dread the holiday season because it... Read More

5 Tips to Reduce Holiday Depression

While war and poor economic conditions begin to affect people... Read More

How To Choose The Hotel Thats Right For You

Getting the right hotel to spend one~s vacation at is... Read More

Romance on a Budget

Valentine's Day is often synonymous with lush velvety looking red... Read More

9 Fantastic Formulas for a Stress Free Holiday!

The holidays are officially here. And so the season for... Read More

Camping And The Right Kind Of Tent

Campers all over the globe prefer to use tents in... Read More

Holiday Tips For Stepfamilies

Holiday Tips For Stepfamilies: Let Go Of The "Brady Bunch"... Read More

2 Quick and Easy Halloween Crafts

Making Halloween crafts can really get you into a festive... Read More

Valentines Day - A Guide for Men

Did you know that after Christmas, Valentine's Day is the... Read More

A Simple Little Holiday Plan

The Thanksgiving leftovers have all been eaten and the gift-buying... Read More

Valentine Gifts From The Heart

One of my fondest childhood memories is of my mother... Read More

Top 5 Ways for an ADD Adult to Have a Happy Holiday

Holidays have the potential to send an adult with Attention... Read More