Tis The Season For Love ? and Stress!

The holidays are upon us and for many people this is the most stressful time of year. There is so much to do and not enough time to do it in, places to go, people to see, gifts to buy, food to prepare, and on and on and on. We may feel overwhelmed, frustrated, exhausted, and angry, rather than joyful, loving and peaceful. Greeting cards proclaim wishes of peace, joy, happiness, and love regardless of the event being celebrated. They talk of families gathering, warm homes filled with love and peace, but for many, those wishes do not translate into reality.

Our memories of wonderful holidays from our childhood and our expectations for this year may put an enormous amount of pressure on us. There are traditions to be followed and expectations to be met, those of others and those we put on ourselves, along with the commercialism that has the stores full of holiday decorations and "gifts" even before the Halloween candy has been put away. Some people will struggle through much of next year to pay off the credit card debt that they accumulate over the holidays. But saddest of all, is when the holiday is over and we think to ourselves "Is that all there is?" "Where was the joy, the peace, the love?" "Why does it seem as though it never measures up to our expectations?"

The answer is "our expectations." One of the ways to reduce holiday stress is to take some time to examine your expectations for the upcoming months. What traditions have to be followed? What have you always done, because it is always done? Make a list, ask those who celebrate with you to make a list as well. Carve out some time to sit down and share your lists and discuss which of these traditions are really important to all of you and which are more work than you want to do. Get everyone involved in doing the things that may have been up to you. Discuss ways in which you can create new traditions or recreate old ones that will bring more peace, joy and love to your family, not only during the holidays. I recently read an interesting book by Gary Chapman called The Five Love Languages: How to express heartfelt commitment to your mate.

Although it's primarily for couples, I think that the premise applies to everyone that we love. The author says that there are 5 basic ways in which we experience feeling loved. We tend to show others we love them in the same way we feel loved. The problems arise when our "love language" is different. The five languages, in random order, are "acts of service" "physical touch" "words of affirmation" "receiving gifts" and "quality time". If, for the holidays, you show your love for someone by "giving them a gift" and their love language is "acts of service" which means that they feel loved when you do something for them, there is a good chance that neither of you will feel that your expectations have been met.

Perhaps, when your family gets together to discuss traditions and expectations for the holidays, you could discuss what would help you feel closer as a family, more loved, more joyful, and how this could create more peace. This can be a season for joy, peace, happiness, and most of all for love.

Lorna Minewiser, Ph.D has been helping people reduce their stress for more than 15 years. She offers individual and group coaching, workshops, CDs, e-books and Stress Reduction and Relaxation kits. She is available for presentations on the power of beliefs and on Stress Reduction. Her popular e-course on Reducing Holiday Stress is available free at http://www.thestressreductioncoach.com

---

The Cheapest Christmas Ever!

Have you ever said "I wish we didn't have to... Read More

7 Tips For Defusing Holiday Stress

KNOW THYSELFThe first key to creating a peaceful holiday season... Read More

Say I Love You For Valentines Day

With Valentine's Day just around the corner, it's time to... Read More

Samanthas Bay Leaf Ritual for the New Year

HI would like to share with you a ritual I... Read More

Making the Holidays More Meaningful

Have the holidays become too commercial for you? Are you... Read More

Christmas Matters

Every year I vow to make Christmas easier, simpler -... Read More

The History of Teddy Bears

Teddy bears have been around since 1902. The teddy bear... Read More

Fathers Day Origins and Inspiration

While mothers have had their special day since 1914, fathers... Read More

How to Put Some Sizzle in Your Summer Parties: 5 Ways to be a Gracious Host and a Great Guest

Now that the hot weather is finally here, we are... Read More

The Fathers Day Celebration

Fathers Day is another reason to celebrate another responsible adult... Read More

10 Ways to Keep Your Expectations From Making You Crazy This Christmas

Christmas is a wonderful time! Everyone is full of good... Read More

Tips for Planning an Egg-stra Special Easter Party

Bunnies & chicks, colourful eggs, and the hunt for hidden... Read More

Spice Up Your Life with an Adventure Holiday!

Are you bored with the routine of city life? Do... Read More

Holiday Beauty Dos and Donts

Why is it that whenever you go to a holiday... Read More

Do It Yourself Gifts

Sometimes gifts that you purchase are not as personalized as... Read More

Its Never Too Early To Shop For Christmas

Every year we go through the same process of making... Read More

Are You Truly Thankful For Everything?

Thanksgiving is the time of year when we stop and... Read More

Orlando, The Vacation Station

If you were asked to name 10 reasons why you... Read More

Bathed in Blue - Love Can Happen for You

Whether you know him by Eros or Cupid, this son... Read More

Kid Birthday Party Game Ideas - 7 Proven Winners

Here are 7 classic kid birthday party game ideas that... Read More

The Gift My Brother Couldnt Give

From the book A Heartland Christmas CollectionIn the first years... Read More

5 Ways to Lose Those Holiday Blues

What a great time of year! It's a time to... Read More

Holiday Survival Guide

The Holiday season has officially begun and Christmas is almost... Read More

Easy Costumes Kids Can Make

The kindergarten class I was teaching was scheduled to perform... Read More

Mothers Day, Do You Know What Youre Giving The Woman Who Gave You Life?

Mother's Day, Do you know what you're giving the woman... Read More

Corporate Holiday Gift Ideas Start With a Possibilities List

Plan ahead this year for your corporate clients and associates... Read More

The History of Christmas Ornaments

History of OrnamentsIn A.D. 336, an early Roman calendar first... Read More

The Origins of Mothers Day

Most people mistakenly believe that Mother's Day is an invention... Read More

Youre How Old?!?

"Well, Happy Birthday! How old are you anyway?""Oh, I'm just... Read More

The Truth about Mistletoe

You can call it the emasculator of the old king,... Read More

Fathers Day Gift Guide

Fathers Day is the one day of the year when... Read More

A Christmas Tradition - Vintage Ornaments

Traditional hand-blown glass Christmas ornaments never seem to go out... Read More

Valentines Day Flowers

Flowers & Valentine's Day go hand in hand. Your Valentine... Read More